From Clueless to Capable: The Day I Built a Computer and Believed in Myself

When you’re young, some skills seem cloaked in mystery, like sorcery reserved for geniuses and tech wizards. Building a computer? That was right up there with rocket science and brain surgery. I assumed there were secrets mere mortals like me weren’t meant to know.

But life has a funny way of pushing you toward the very things you once swore you couldn’t do. You can either jump in feet first and learn to swim, or wait for the tide to rise and drag you under anyway. Either way, you’re getting wet.

And so, in my mid-twenties, I found myself staring down yet another failing laptop. It wheezed, groaned, and crashed under the weight of programs it could no longer handle. I was broke, still living with my parents, and drowning in student loans. The idea of dropping another few hundred dollars on a “cheap” computer that would die in two years made me want to scream into a pillow.

Alright, maybe I’m being a little dramatic, but that’s what you’re here for, isn’t it?

Anyway, I was ranting to my boyfriend about how all laptops were secretly designed to self-destruct after the warranty expired, when he calmly suggested, “Why don’t you just build your own computer?”

I blinked. Me? Build a computer? Was he crazy? He did remember who he was talking to right?

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Computers, to me, were mysterious boxes powered by tiny gremlins and questionable magic. I had no idea what lived inside those metal cases, chips, cards, wires, possibly dark energy? I was convinced it was all beyond my comprehension or at the very least too expensive for me to fail at. No, the safe bet was just leave it to the experts.

But my boyfriend reassured me that he’d done it before and that he’d teach me. And that, to me, made all the difference. I’ve always appreciated people who say, “Let’s do this together,” not “Let me just do it for you.” He believed I could do it and all I needed was a little guidance.

It turns out, building a computer isn’t mystical at all, it’s basically adult LEGO. Or, if you prefer, a high-stakes IKEA project without the Allen wrench and with slightly more terrifying price tags.

Once you know which parts fit together (the motherboard and CPU have to be compatible, for instance), the rest is pretty much plug-and-play. We picked out the parts piece by piece: RAM, graphics card, hard drive, case, power supply. He explained what everything did, how much power I’d need, and why I shouldn’t cheap out on cooling fans unless I enjoyed the smell of burning plastic.

Assembly was surprisingly satisfying. The motherboard, that flat green city of circuits, practically tells you where each piece goes. Most parts only fit in one spot, it’s almost foolproof. The trickiest part? Making sure every last cord is plugged in correctly. There’s always one that likes to hide and sometimes cords don’t quite reach so you have to get a different one.

Once it was all together, we booted it up with an operating system on a USB drive (a step up from the “CD-ROM” era). The screen flickered to life, and, voilà, my very own computer.

That was over fifteen years ago.

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I’ve only had to swap out a few parts since, upgrading the graphics card here, adding a new hard drive there. Instead of throwing down thousands on a brand-new computer every few years, I get to be strategic and invest in pieces that will last. If one piece gets old or outdated, I replace just that piece. It’s like car maintenance, but less greasy.

My first build cost me about $1,000, spread out over a few months of saving, but it’s still running strong. Not bad for something I once thought required a degree in wizardry.

But the best part wasn’t the computer, it was what it did for me.

That project shifted something in my mindset. It made me question how many other things I’d written off as “too complicated.” Since then, I’ve built a shed, laid a patio, and even tried to fix my washing machine (it almost worked, turns out the part required more muscle than I had).

Now, I don’t rush to say, “I can’t.” Instead, I ask, “How hard could it be?”

It’s not about proving I “don’t need no man”, it’s about proving to myself that I’m capable. Because the truth is, most obstacles aren’t out there in the world; they’re in our heads. Once you push past that mental block, confidence grows like compounding interest.

And if it all goes sideways? Well, at least you’ll have a good story, and probably a few extra screws. Okay, in my case, a lot of extra screws.

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Ready to Try It Yourself?

If you’ve ever thought, “I could never build a computer,” consider this your sign. Start by watching a few YouTube tutorials, read a build guide on PCPartPicker, and pick components that match your budget and goals.

It might take patience (and maybe a few deep breaths when cables don’t click in right), but when that screen finally flickers to life, you’ll feel like you just performed magic—minus the wand.

And if all else fails? You’ll still have learned more about how your tech works than 90% of people ever do. Plus, you’ll gain something far more valuable than a PC: proof that you can tackle things that once terrified you.

Because sometimes, the best way to build confidence… is to literally build something.

What You Need

  • Case – The shell that holds everything together.
  • Motherboard – The “main board” that connects all components.
  • CPU (Processor) – The brain of the operation
  • RAM – The short-term memory; helps your computer multitask.
  • Storage – SSD or HDD, where all your files live.
  • Power Supply (PSU) – Feeds electricity to every component.
  • Graphics Card (GPU) – Optional, but crucial for gaming or design work.
  • Cooling System – Fans or liquid cooling to keep things chill.

completed: 2010

cost: About $1000 (has saved me at least that much in replacement costs over a 15 year lifespan)

miles from home: 0

wanna check out some of my other bucket list items? Check out my Bucket List and My Reverse Bucket List

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The Confidence Boost of a Facial

I remember my very first pimple in 5th grade. It was right on my chin and it was HUGE. I felt like everyone was just starting at this giant, white thing on my face. It felt like it would never go away. I wasn’t even an especially vain child, but it was certainly an uncomfortable feeling. I was reassured by the adults in my life that acne was just a phase and it would pass, just wash your face more and all will be well. I diligently washed my face and waited for the acne of the teen years to pass. I waited, and waited and waited, and waited. I tried various products over the years to no avail. The acne just never quite went away. 

As it turns out, I was viciously lied to, dear reader! I had been unfortunately cursed with adult acne driven by hormones and like herolds of war it came each month right before ahem my “visitor”. So it was in my late twenties that I somewhat resigned myself to the fact that I would almost always be plagued with these unfortunate blemishes and that there was really nothing quite to be done about them. 

Now, I have shared about my monthly habit of going for a massage and indulging in a small mini-vacation. Each month, I entered the waiting room, noticed the wall of products for skin and saw the advertisements for facials. I decided that perhaps, I did not need to resign myself to such a fate as simply accepting that I would always struggle every month to control the small mountain range which jutted up from my chin each month in new and interesting patterns. Perhaps, I need not worry that a small child could be entertained for hours by connecting the dots. So, I scheduled an appointment with Camille not really knowing what it would entail or even to expect that much. 

It was, dear reader, one of the very best decisions of my life. Camille is knowledgeable, personable and the sweetest woman one could ever ask for. She was so very kind about my problem and spoke with me about exactly what I wanted from the appointment, was honest about the sorts of products she would need to use and discussed the cost of the initial treatments as it would require upgrades to the basic facial. I told her that I was here to solve a problem not necessarily to simply relax and enjoy myself and that I was willing to give the upgrades a try. She carefully examined my skin and set to work. 

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It was not an unpleasant experience by any means. It was absolutely wonderful to have my skin carefully tended to with gentle scrubs and tinctures designed to combat the acne and leave me feeling fresh. The only part that was unpleasant was when she offered to do some extractions to which I acquiesced and she carefully pushed out the gunk that was blocking my pores and creating unsightly mounds upon my face. Through out the treatment we talked and got to know one another better. I told her about my job and she shared about her own interests. As it turns out, we both are partial to Japanese Black and White Horror Films from the 1960’s. A niche interest if there ever was one. 

At the end, she gave me a simple routine of two daily products and a weekly exfoliant. My skepticism was palpable that surely these three products were not the key to unlocking clear skin after I have tried everything else under the sun. She reassured me to trust her and I felt that I had little else to lose. I bought them and went home. Now, the next day, I could have been easily forgiven for almost giving up entirely and throwing in the towel, because lo and behold, a giant pimple had risen up in defiance of everything to taunt my efforts. I took a deep breath and reminded myself that sometimes treatment may require putting up with some temporary pains. Sure enough, it did quickly go away and by following the routine laid out by Camille, my face actually stayed relatively clear. I still had monthly cycles of acne but not nearly what it was. What were formerly my very best days where my skin was almost clear, were now my very worst days.  Now, I do notice if I go too long between facials my skin starts to backslide, but in general I can go 3 to 4 months in between more intensive treatments to manage my adult acne.. 

I am not a vain person, dear reader, but I was at times embarrassed by my acne. I knew that despite it being caused by an underlying hormone imbalance that I couldn’t control, people did judge me because of it. Being able to walk around with clear skin and looking good has been such a confidence booster. In fact, looking good is linked with better performance, increased productivity, decreased anxiety and sparking those happy, feel good hormones. Which makes sense, if you don’t feel good about the way you look you’re going to anticipate people judging you poorly, not getting the assistance you may need and increase your sense that things aren’t going to go your way. I am in no way, dear reader, saying that your self-worth should be tied to your looks. We should try to take care of ourselves the best we can and work to feel comfortable with how we look.

How can you look your best and feel your best?

Now this is decidedly one of those items that fall under “principles of the thing” rather than the thing itself. For me, the facials are about helping me look my best to help me live my best life. It’s not about getting a facial as part of my bucket list. Although, a full spa day is certainly on the list now as just a day of pampering and relaxation.

As I just shared looking our best, helps us feel our best. When we have things that get in the way it can be much harder to feel good about ourselves. For me it was acne, for my mother it was rosacea. For someone else it may be wrinkles or chronic dandruff. So while, I am not encouraging you to simply go get a facial (although you can, they’re rather enjoyable), what I am encouraging you to do, dear reader, is try going to the experts and professionals who are trained to assist you with whatever problem you happen to have.. You may be surprised at how easy a fix your seemingly insurmountable problem is!

What I loved about Camille was she was extremely honest about her limitations, her education and recommendations and readily communicated with me to help me make the best decisions for my skin’s health. Is getting a semi-regular facial expensive? Yes, but so were all the various products that I tried which failed to produce results.