Stop Waiting for the After

After the trip. After things calm down. After I fix myself. After I get my finances together.

Always after. Always somewhere in the future.

We tell ourselves these stories so often they begin to feel like truth. Life will really begin once the chaos settles, once we become more disciplined, more organized, more healed, more prepared. Until then, we endure. We keep our heads down, grit our teeth, and tell ourselves this is just a season—even when that season stretches on for years.

And yet, time has a way of slipping through our fingers when we are always waiting. One day we look up and realize we have not so much lived as survived. The days were filled. The calendar was full. But the life itself felt strangely absent.

Of course, there were moments of joy. There always are.

A long-awaited weekend getaway. A carefully planned weeklong vacation. Maybe, if we were especially lucky or brave, a two-week escape that felt almost indulgent. These moments gave us oxygen. We counted down to them obsessively, letting anticipation carry us through exhausting workweeks. The promise of rest, novelty, and beauty became the thing that kept us moving forward.

For a brief while, we could breathe.

Photo by MART PRODUCTION on Pexels.com

But then the trip ended. The air thinned again. And the familiar weight returned, heavier somehow for having been briefly lifted. The emotional letdown after travel crashed over us like a wave, knocking us off our feet. What was meant to restore us instead highlighted how depleted we were the rest of the time.

I remember this feeling vividly after my very first cruise.

I had been so excited to experience it with my sister, who had gone on one before and filled my imagination with stories and photos. We planned everything meticulously, savoring the anticipation as much as the trip itself. And the week away truly was a dream. Swimming with dolphins. Snorkeling over a shipwreck. Walking along the famed pink beaches of Bermuda. For a few precious days, life felt expansive and light.

Then it ended.

I was sitting in a train terminal in New York, waiting for the train back to Philadelphia, when a familiar sense of dread began to creep in. My heart started pounding. My mind raced ahead of me, already back at my desk. Had I missed deadlines? What had happened with my clients while I was gone? What did my inbox look like? Would I be returning to chaos I could never quite get ahead of?

The anxiety built quickly, swallowing all the ease and joy I had felt just hours earlier. The relaxation I had carefully collected over the week evaporated, replaced by a sense of impending doom. I realized, with startling clarity, that the problem was not that the vacation was too short. It was that my daily life was unsustainable.

I did not stay at that job much longer.

Photo by Jill Wellington on Pexels.com

Looking back, I can see what was really happening. Time away had become the only time I felt fully alive. Travel was no longer something that enhanced my life. It was something that made my life bearable. It was not a chance to breathe deeply, but the only moment I was allowed to breathe at all.

That is a heavy thing to place on something meant to be joyful.

Travel, adventure, and novelty are not the villains here. They are generous teachers. They show us beauty. They remind us of wonder. They broaden our perspective and refresh our spirits. But when they become lifelines rather than highlights, they quietly reveal a deeper problem: a life structured in a way that requires escape.

It is hard to feel at home in your own life if every day feels like scaling a mountain rather than taking a gentle walk through the woods. When effort is constant and rest is rationed, even joy begins to feel transactional—something we earn only after enduring enough discomfort.

Living well does not happen by accident. It requires intention, attention, and a willingness to examine the parts of our lives we have normalized simply because they are familiar.

So what does it mean to design a life that supports you rather than one you need rescuing from?

It does not mean eliminating hard work or responsibility. It does not mean chasing constant happiness or turning every day into a highlight reel. It means building rhythms that allow you to inhabit your life rather than flee from it. It means making choices—sometimes small, sometimes uncomfortable—that reduce the daily friction slowly draining your energy.

Photo by Quincy Anderson on Pexels.com

It might look like boundaries that protect your evenings. Or financial systems that lower your baseline anxiety. Or a job that challenges you without consuming you. It might look like simplifying instead of accumulating, choosing enough instead of more, rest instead of relentless self-improvement.

Most of all, it means refusing to postpone your life until some imagined version of yourself finally arrives.

If we are always waiting to become someone better before we allow ourselves to live well, we may wait forever. Growth does not require self-denial as proof of worthiness. A meaningful life is not a reward reserved for those who have perfected themselves.

When we begin to live well now—imperfectly, quietly, intentionally—something subtle but powerful happens. Travel changes its role. Adventures stop carrying the weight of our unmet needs. They become what they were always meant to be: enhancements rather than escapes.

Instead of giving our lives color, travel adds highlights.

A beautiful trip becomes like the right accessory. It does not replace the outfit. It elevates it. It brings contrast, texture, and delight to something already functional and meaningful. The joy of returning home no longer feels like loss, but like integration—bringing what we learned and felt back into a life that can hold it.

This is not a call to stop dreaming, exploring, or longing for more. It is an invitation to stop living entirely in the future. To notice where you are postponing joy out of habit rather than necessity. To ask, gently and honestly, what would make this season more livable.

The goal is not to suck the marrow out of every moment. The goal is to stop starving ourselves the rest of the year.

A life you do not want to escape from does not have to be extraordinary. It simply has to be yours, tended to with care, lived in with intention, and allowed to matter right now, not later. So what are you waiting for dear reader? Go forth and create a life for now.

When Winter Howls, Let the Opera Sing

We are experiencing a bit of a cold snap here in Pennsylvania. The wind howls outside as I write this, and temperatures plummet from merely chilly to, quite frankly, unbearable. We are advised to stay indoors, and even the sun itself has decided to deprive us of what little warmth it might have offered. While I can certainly enjoy winter outdoor activities, it is on days like these that perhaps we ought to turn to indoor pursuits. Ones that do not come with frostbite warnings attached.

Given the gloomy monotony of the outdoors, I also tend to gravitate toward things with a bit more flair and ambiance. And what could offer more of both than the opera?

Now, dear reader, I can imagine what you may be thinking. The opera? Where everything is sung in a language you do not understand? Where people dress in finery and say things like, “Why, Penelope, your gown looks absolutely divine. I am certain it will catch Edward’s eye,” as if you have been whisked away to eighteenth-century England. Perhaps you are intimidated by the grand architecture of the opera house itself, the richness of the spectacle, or the sheer weight of history behind it all. You may worry the plotlines will feel distant or the music dull.

Allow me to assuage your fears. Opera is far more down to earth than it first appears, especially today, when it has become a welcoming space for all, not just wealthy elites and snobbish intellectuals. Though I am sure they are still wandering about somewhere, we need not pay them any mind.

As for dressing up, you certainly can, but you do not have to. I did on my first visit, simply for the fun of it. Besides, I had a beautiful gown begging for a night out, and how could I deny it the pleasure of an opera house? It was stunning, a deep purple with a jeweled neckline that hugged my waist before falling into an A-line skirt. It swirled around my legs as I practically danced through the halls in excitement. As a senior in high school at the time, I earned a mixture of approving and amused glances from my elders.

That first experience was a German opera, Die Fledermaus (The Bat), at the Fulton Opera House, one of the few opera houses designated as a National Historic Landmark. The building itself was breathtaking, restored in 1995 to its original Victorian elegance. One step inside, and you might think yourself transported to the opera halls of Europe, with ivory hues, rich red accents, gilded columns, and balconies adorned with swirling gold details. The ceiling features elegant arches and intricate designs that invite the eye upward. I remember being awestruck by this unassuming treasure in my own community.

From the outside, the Fulton sits modestly among other historic buildings, its facade surprisingly plain. The sign announcing “Fulton” feels more reminiscent of a mid-century movie theater than an esteemed opera house, which is fitting in a way. For a time, it did serve as a run-down movie theater before its restoration transformed it into the jewel of Lancaster City that it is today.

My second opera experience, however, was far more casual. It did not take place in an opera house at all, but rather at my local movie theater. It is hard to find anything less intimidating than a relaxed afternoon at the cinema, complete with popcorn and soda. You could show up in pajamas and no one would bat an eye.

This accessibility is thanks to the Metropolitan Opera, often shortened to the Met, which streams live performances to movie theaters around the world. The Met is one of the most renowned opera houses in existence and sits high on any opera lover’s list of must-visit destinations. With the Met: Live in HD series, one no longer needs to travel to New York City to experience world-class performances. Depending on your theater, the seats may even be more comfortable. Mine has reclining chairs and serves alcohol, which makes a four-hour performance surprisingly enjoyable.

One of my favorite parts is coordinating visits with friends who live far away. We attend the same performance in different cities, text during intermission, and discuss it afterward. Even separated by hundreds of miles, it becomes a shared experience. The Met: Live in HD series offers a wide range of composers and styles. Some productions are modernized with contemporary settings and costumes, while others lean into the historical period in which they were written. Still others fully embrace fantasy, transporting audiences into worlds of myth and legend. Because the performances are filmed, you never miss a detail. Every embellishment on a costume and every carefully placed set piece is visible.

Of course, far beyond the costumes, props, scenery, and architecture is the music itself. It is enchanting, enrapturing, and enthralling in equal measure. Opera spans the full breadth of human emotion, joy, sorrow, longing, fury, tenderness, capturing your heart and refusing to let go. I still remember the hush that fell over the audience as the first notes rose from the orchestra pit, the way sound seemed to ripple through the room. Then came the singers, their voices soaring with jaw-dropping range and power, filling every corner of the space. You do not simply hear opera. You feel it vibrating in your chest, settling into your bones.

Although I speak German conversationally, it is nowhere near sufficient to follow an opera. Thankfully, modern audiences no longer need fluency in French, Italian, or German to enjoy the art form. Operas are almost always subtitled in English, allowing viewers to follow the plot while fully immersing themselves in the music. I vividly remember sitting in the theater, completely enraptured in a way I had never experienced through recordings at home. The notes were richer and fuller, the harmonies more layered, the emotion unmistakable.

Opera is more than a theatrical performance. It is poetic song and living art. It carries a rich cultural history across Europe, filled with timeless stories and enduring truths. Nor is opera confined to the past. Contemporary operas continue to be written and performed, carrying the tradition forward into the modern world.


First Operas to Try (A Gentle Introduction)

If you are curious about opera but unsure where to begin, starting with the right work makes all the difference. These operas are frequently recommended for newcomers because they feature engaging stories, memorable music, and emotional clarity.

Die Fledermaus – Johann Strauss II
A lively comic opera full of humor, mistaken identities, and infectious music. Lighthearted and approachable. It was also my own first opera, so it comes highly recommended.

La Bohème – Giacomo Puccini
A deeply human story of love, friendship, and loss, paired with lush, emotionally direct music.

Carmen – Georges Bizet
Dramatic, passionate, and instantly recognizable, with a strong central character and unforgettable melodies.

The Magic Flute – Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart
A blend of fantasy, symbolism, and humor, written to appeal to broad audiences and still accessible today.

The Barber of Seville – Gioachino Rossini
Fast-paced, witty, and energetic, this comedy is a joy from start to finish.


How to See an Opera Yourself

If you find yourself intrigued, seeing an opera is easier than you might expect.

Check local listings.
Many cities have regional opera companies or host touring productions. Local arts calendars are a great place to start.

Look into streaming performances.
The Met: Live in HD series brings world-class opera to movie theaters worldwide, often at a much lower cost than live tickets.

Seek out local opera houses and smaller companies.
Do not overlook intimate venues. Smaller productions are often more affordable and can feel wonderfully personal.

Do not be afraid to start small.
Matinees, shorter operas, or chamber performances can be ideal first experiences.

Opera has a way of meeting you where you are. All you need to do is step inside and listen.


Opera does not have to be intimidating. It is a welcoming, fantastical place that offers refuge from the cold and invites you into a world of sound and story. So when the wind howls and winter presses in, consider, dear reader, letting the opera sing you warm.

Completed: 2006

Cost: $23 (The Met Live is typically $23 and Opera house tickets can range from $25 to $100)

Miles from home: Home town

Mid-January Musings: Embracing the Pause

It’s the middle of January. The year stretches ahead, vast and unknown, while the busyness of the holidays has already slipped behind. Resolutions that felt urgent on January 1 may have already slipped through your fingers. PTO is carefully rationed for future trips. Unless you’re a federal employee, the next holiday is a small consolation at best. Life feels paused, caught in the gray space between what has ended and what has yet to begin. There is nothing to mark the calendar, nothing urgent to do, and maybe you’re not even sure what you’re waiting for.

For many, this stretch can feel unsettling — a restlessness like an itch you can’t quite scratch. It’s a space that’s heavy with anticipation yet empty of drama. It could drive even the most patient person slightly mad if we try to resist it.

And yet, I’ve learned that this “long middle” is fertile if we allow it to be. You see, dear reader, I approach my year much as I approach my day: with contemplation and reflection. Of course, the day does not begin quietly. I am awakened by two yowling, demanding, furry tyrants named Gemini and Orion, who treat my legs like an obstacle course and my face like a morning bell. I weave around them, careful not to trip, while they make it abundantly clear that food is a matter of life and death. Only once their bowls are full and their attention momentarily diverted do I grab my journal. One might ask why I don’t start journaling first — but only someone who has never had a cat would pose such a question. Thinking, let alone writing, with feline insurrection in full swing is impossible.

Once fed, my little darlings curl up beside me, their purrs vibrating softly against the quiet room, a small price to pay for peace. In that early window, my mind hovers delicately between sleep and wakefulness, with the last traces of dreams still clinging like morning fog. I often surprise myself with what emerges on the page — fleeting worries, lingering hopes, tiny insights I might never notice in the rush of the day. For fifteen minutes, I am fully present with my own thoughts, listening as the day slowly unfolds around me. The gentle hum of a cat’s contentment is the perfect backdrop for reflection, a reminder that even chaos can give way to stillness if we wait for it patiently.

This early-morning clarity feels like a metaphor for January itself. The holidays are over, spring is far off, and yet there is a quiet, powerful energy in the pause. The month stretches before us, unspectacular on the surface, but full of potential for reflection, insight, and subtle preparation. Like my journaling practice, mid-January asks us to slow down, to notice, and to tune into what is quietly emerging.


Learning to Live Well in the Liminal Space

So how do we inhabit this “long middle” without feeling restless or lost? The answer is not in rushing or in forcing productivity. It is in embracing the small windows of presence, in tuning in instead of turning away. Some practices I have found particularly grounding:

  • Early-morning reflection: Like my journaling habit, these quiet moments give you access to thoughts and feelings that are often buried under daily noise. Your subconscious speaks differently when the world is still.
  • Observation: Take notice of subtle details around you — the shifting patterns of light through bare trees, the smell of frost in the air, the warmth of a cat curled at your feet.
  • Gentle intentions: Instead of big, sweeping resolutions, consider small focus points for the day or week. What do you want to notice? How do you want to feel?
  • Micro-reflections: Write down one fleeting thought, one small win, or one subtle insight each day. Over time, these quiet observations add up into something meaningful.

January, like those first fifteen minutes of the day, is an invitation to listen. To yourself. To your environment. To the stillness that so often goes unnoticed during busier seasons.


Restlessness as Opportunity

That itch of January is not a problem. It is a signal, a nudge toward attention, reflection, and subtle growth. It can be uncomfortable, yes, but it is alive, and alive is what matters. By leaning into this restlessness, rather than avoiding it, you cultivate patience and clarity. You discover small insights that can set the tone for your weeks and months ahead.

Think of it like seeds beneath frozen soil. The ground seems still, colorless, empty. And yet beneath the surface, quiet processes are unfolding, preparing for bloom. So it is with mid-January. What appears as waiting or monotony is, in fact, preparation. The quiet work of thought, reflection, and noticing lays the foundation for meaningful action in the months ahead.


The Gift of Mid-January

January is not empty. It is full, not with spectacle or noise, but with subtle, meaningful opportunities. The long middle teaches us to slow down, pay attention, and care for ourselves in ways the busyness of December rarely allows.

Much like my morning journaling ritual, this month invites us to stop, listen, and notice. To honor the stillness and let it guide us. To embrace small rituals, quiet reflection, and gentle intentions.

So rather than rushing to fill the days, linger. Observe. Journal. Walk. Notice. And trust that this quiet, understated month is shaping you in ways that will ripple through your year. Even in the gray, even in the waiting, there is quiet wonder.

Podcast From a Galaxy Not All That Far Away

Dear readers, I have a bit of a confession to make. I am not always the posh, delicately spoken flower you may have come to know me as. There are moments when I am decidedly less than ladylike, especially when I am in the throes of passion. Passionate nerdom, to be precise.

Picture me fiercely debating and analyzing the world of science fiction with three of my friends. Add to that the unfortunate fact that I learned to swear from a literal sailor, and when I get salty, I bring the whole ocean with me. It is actually rather freeing to allow a different aspect of myself to shine. After all, we are all multifaceted beings with many sides to ourselves. I am not always channeling my inner Victorian. Sometimes it is my inner Viking warrior, and in this case, it is a girl with some serious beef with filmmakers who simply cannot respect the source material. Is it really so difficult? But honestly, that is part of the fun. My wit and banter at full strength, turned loose on a topic near and dear to my heart: science fiction.

About twice a month, I get together with Scott, Miles, and Dave to review and discuss all things sci-fi. We tend to focus on movies and television, largely because not everyone in the group is as avid a reader as I am. Asking someone to complete an 800-page novel in two weeks is unlikely to end happily. A film, by contrast, is a two-and-a-half-hour commitment instead of twenty hours of reading. Well, twenty hours for them. I can usually polish off a book in eight to ten, depending on how compelling it is.

Alongside reviews, we dive into science fiction news, theories, and the occasional heated debate. Opinions are shared freely, defended passionately, and sometimes gleefully attacked. There is a lot of laughter, teasing, and the kind of spirited disagreement that only works when everyone genuinely enjoys one another. Lest you worry that the boys cannot hold their own against me, fear not. Listen long enough and you will hear them all start to sing “It’s Been a Long Road” just to derail me. Of course, we cannot help but needle Dave for his love of lens flares in Star Trek (for the record, he detests the J. J. Abrams films known for them).

It wouldn’t be a convention without cosplayers

One of my favorite aspects of the podcast is that we do not limit ourselves to recent releases. Often, we revisit older films, the kind that have been forgotten, overlooked, or never widely known in the first place. Sometimes we strike gold. Other times we are left staring into the abyss, wondering how something ever made it to screen. Either way, the process has expanded my palate and deepened my appreciation for different kinds of media.

Some of the films I have ended up loving are ones I never would have chosen on my own. Not because they were masterpieces, but because they offered a fascinating window into how past generations imagined the future. One surprising treasure was Battle Beyond the Stars, which drew inspiration from The Magnificent Seven and the classic Japanese story Seven Samurai. Was it campy? Yes. Was it ridiculous? Absolutely. But goodness, was it funny to watch. Which, admittedly, I was already primed to enjoy given my fondness for older Japanese films. Believe it or not, it was nominated for five Saturn Awards, including Best Science Fiction Film and Best Special Effects. Watching films like this, you can see how cultural values, fears, and hopes were projected forward in time. I have found myself thinking more about how special effects have evolved, how our expectations of technology have shifted, and how often we miss the mark when predicting where we will be in twenty, fifty, or even a hundred years. It makes me wonder what things we consider innate and unchanging now will one day be quietly overturned.

That is what I love most about science fiction. It asks questions. It forces us to examine the implications of technologies just beyond our reach and to consider whether they will ultimately be used for good or for harm. Science fiction reflects the norms of its time, but at its best, it challenges them.

My pilgrimage to Star Trek’s Enterprise housed in the Smithsonian

Star Trek, in particular, has always excelled at this. It does not just explore the possibilities among the stars, but asks us to consider what is possible here on Earth. It gave us the first interracial kiss on television. It pushed audiences to wrestle with the idea of artificial personhood through Data, asking what consciousness really is and what, if anything, separates us from a machine.

This franchise comes up the most on our podcast, likely because it has spanned generations, but also because it is such a deeply philosophical show, challenging and shaping its viewers’ thinking. It certainly shaped mine growing up. I vividly remember watching the Voyager episode “Nemesis,” where Chakotay is seemingly taken in by an alien race, the Vori, who are fighting against the technologically advanced and oppressive Kradin. It is later revealed that this conflict is part of a brainwashing simulation designed to condition him to hate the Kradin. Even after the truth is uncovered, Chakotay struggles to be in their presence. That episode left a lasting impression on me, illustrating how propaganda can turn a compassionate heart toward hatred more effectively than any history book ever could.

I have been podcasting with the guys for nearly ten years now, and it has been a wild ride. Beyond broadcasting my thoughts and engaging with listeners on social media, the podcast has taken me to science fiction conventions, where I have had the opportunity to interview actors, creators, and other figures within the genre.

None of them have been A-list celebrities, but many have graced a red carpet or two. More importantly, the vast majority have been genuinely lovely people: gracious, thoughtful, and generous with their time. They offer insightful answers, often laced with humor, and seem truly appreciative that anyone still cares about the stories they helped bring to life.

Star Trek Panel 2025 Shore Leave Convention

I still vividly remember my first solo interview. It was surreal walking up to the booth at the start of the convention and being handed a press pass. Me? Press? I had not gone to school for journalism. I was a cheeky woman arguing on the internet with her friends for entertainment. I glanced down again and began taking pictures of the wild chaos that is a convention: costumed characters from different franchises co-mingling with those of us dressed in street clothes. I studied the map and instructions for where I needed to go and made my way through the crowd, stopping to take photos and absorb everything around me. Since the interview would not happen for an hour or two, I scouted the location so I knew exactly where I needed to be. In the meantime, I checked the convention schedule, trying to determine which panels to cover so I could report back properly to my colleagues who were counting on me. Ever the overachiever, I was determined not to disappoint the guys.

As the time approached, my nervousness grew. Here I was, face to face with someone who surely had better things to do than talk to me, yet had kindly agreed to do so anyway. I had carefully written and submitted my questions in advance for approval, determined to avoid any last-minute improvisation. My stomach fluttered with butterflies as I reread my notes, silently begging my ADHD impulse control to please, just this once, stick to the script. Somehow, I managed not to fumble with the recording equipment.

After the first question, something shifted. The nerves faded, and the conversation began to flow. Perhaps it was the therapist in me, instinctively comfortable in a question-and-answer rhythm. I promise there was no psychoanalyzing involved. Mostly. Some habits are harder to turn off than others. I walked away with the realization that these people are, at their core, just like everyone else I have met along the way. One particularly lovely memory from this past summer is of Tracee Cocco, who was simply delightful. She seemed genuinely stunned by the crowd cheering for her, walking out on stage with her phone raised, filming the audience with the same awe we felt toward her. This from a woman who has spent over thirty years in Hollywood as an actress, model, and stuntwoman, appearing in more than one hundred Star Trek episodes and rubbing elbows with the likes of Patrick Stewart.

Not all my interviews were famous for their screen time: Charles Dunbar is an anthropologist who studies anime

Being on the podcast has opened doors I never imagined possible and has cemented friendships across generations: Boomer, Gen X, and Millennial, with the occasional appearance by Scott’s son, a Gen Z. When I was first invited on, I never imagined I would still be doing this years later, or that saying “sure” to chatting about shows I loved would lead to such unexpected experiences.

What it has ultimately given me is a space where all my selves are welcome: the thoughtful analyst, the passionate fan, the therapist, the nerd, the woman who swears too much and cares deeply. In a genre devoted to imagining better futures, the podcast has quietly given me something just as meaningful in the present, a place to belong, to question, to laugh, and to keep wondering.

Thinking About Starting a Podcast?

If you have ever considered starting a podcast, my best advice is to begin simply. Pick a topic you genuinely care about and find people you enjoy talking to. You do not need professional equipment or a perfectly polished format right out of the gate. What matters most is consistency, curiosity, and a willingness to keep showing up even when the audience is small. A good podcast grows out of conversation, not performance. If you are having fun and asking thoughtful questions, listeners will feel it.

Give yourself time to find your rhythm. Early episodes may feel awkward, unfocused, or rough around the edges, and that is completely normal. Podcasting, like any creative practice, is learned by doing. The skills come with repetition, reflection, and the humility to improve as you go.

Miles getting attacked by an alien

A Gentle Reality Check

It is also worth saying that starting a podcast does not automatically lead to press passes, convention access, or interviews with celebrities. Those opportunities take time and careful cultivation. They are built on reputation, respect for the process, and a genuine appreciation for the people whose work you are covering.

If you hope to conduct interviews at conventions, begin by reaching out to the event’s leadership to learn their specific process. Each convention handles media requests differently, and respecting those boundaries matters. From there, reach out to guests thoughtfully, ideally through their handler or publicist when possible, and be prepared to hear no. A declined request is not a failure; it is simply part of the landscape.

Always do your research. Know who you are speaking with, understand their work, and come prepared with questions in advance. Showing up informed and professional signals that you value their time. Over time, that consistency builds trust. And trust, more than anything else, is what earns you a reputation as someone who is respectful, reliable, and welcome in these spaces.

Completed: Started 2018

Cost: I honestly have no idea how much it costs Scott to host the website each month or the recording equipment for me it’s free.

Miles from home: We record virtually

For more reflections on meaningful experiences, future dreams, and moments worth remembering, explore my Bucket List and Reverse Bucket List posts.

How to Find Wonder Again: Practicing Everyday Awe in Darker Months

December is always the darkest month. The Winter Solstice arrives with the longest night of the year, quietly marking the slow ascent back toward the light of spring. It is both an ending and a beginning. A hinge in the calendar. A pause between what has been and what might be.

It is also a time of renewal. We reflect on the year behind us, tallying lessons learned and losses survived, and we look ahead with cautious hope. Yet for all that symbolism, December still represents another three to four months before winter fully loosens its grip. The cold does not politely retreat once the holidays end. The bitter reach of Arctic winds lingers, stretching farther south than usual this year, brushing even warmer regions with frost and ice.

With the sun reduced to a pale visitor and the cold driving us indoors, many people feel the familiar post-holiday letdown. The lights come down. The tinsel disappears. The steady drumbeat of gatherings and celebrations fades into silence. Roads turn ugly with soot and slush. Gardens lie flattened and forgotten. Trees stand stripped bare, their branches like exposed bones against the sky. Everything feels gray, muted, suspended.

Time stretches out ahead of us, long and uncertain, offering only the occasional tease of warmth on a rare day that creeps near fifty degrees. It can feel like winter has sucked the life out of the world. And sometimes, out of us too.

All this to say, winter can really drain a person.

And yet, over the years, I have learned something important. Winter is not devoid of wonder. We are simply out of practice at seeing it.

Photo by Dave Haas on Pexels.com

Why Wonder Feels Harder in Winter

Wonder thrives on contrast, novelty, and movement. Spring explodes with color. Summer buzzes with life. Autumn dazzles us with fire and gold. Winter, by comparison, feels like subtraction. Color drains away. Sound is muffled. Life retreats underground or inward. Our modern world does not help. We are conditioned to associate wonder with spectacle, with big moments and bright displays especially at Christmas time. When those disappear, we assume wonder has gone with them. 

But winter does not offer pageantry in the same way. It offers something quieter. Subtler. More restrained. Like a dancer who understands that all she needs is a stage and her movements to create beauty, rather than an entire set and multiple costume changes. 

As we are often exhausted by the time winter truly sets in, we are not exactly primed to go looking for subtlety. December often follows a marathon of busyness. Social obligations. Emotional labor. Financial strain. The pressure to show up smiling and generous even when you are running on fumes. By the time January arrives, many of us are not ready to be curious. We are ready to be done.

So when the world slows down, we interpret it as emptiness instead of invitation to rest, reflect and truly see what is all around us.

Photo by Darius Krause on Pexels.com

The Magic Hidden in Plain Sight

Yes, driving in snow can be maddening. The clenched jaw. The white knuckles on the steering wheel. The muttered curses when traffic crawls and visibility drops. And yet, there are moments when the frustration cracks open into something else. Sunlight hits freshly fallen snow and suddenly everything sparkles. The world looks newly made. Ordinary streets turn luminous. Even the most familiar landscape feels briefly enchanted.

A winter forest carries its own kind of beauty. Bare trees reveal shapes and patterns hidden all summer long. Branches lace together like sketches against the sky. Fog drapes itself through trunks and hollows, softening edges and swallowing sound. There is a stillness there that feels almost sacred. There is nothing quite like a walk in the forest alone in the winter. For that brief time it feels as if you have been swallowed up into another world long forgotten. 

Winter wonder often arrives unannounced and unadorned. It does not shout for attention. It waits for you to notice.

Learning to Look Differently

Finding wonder in darker months requires a shift in how we look at the world. Not faster. Slower. Not broader. Narrower. It asks us to trade spectacle for attention.

This is not a season that rewards multitasking. It rewards presence, something many of us struggle with these days. Winter is asking us to be grounded, to notice the smaller things. It’s the warm cup of tea in your hands. Watching the steam curling upwards as you gaze out at footprints in freshly fallen snow an echo of life passing through. These are not dramatic moments. They are small, fleeting, and easily overlooked.

Winter teaches us that awe does not always arrive dressed in grandeur. Sometimes it arrives disguised as ordinary.

Photo by Roman Biernacki on Pexels.com

Practicing Everyday Awe

Awe is often framed as something rare. Something reserved for mountaintops and once-in-a-lifetime experiences. But everyday awe is built through habit, not circumstance.

Start small. Choose one moment each day to truly notice. The quality of the light. The texture of cold air in your lungs. The sound of wind moving through bare branches. Write it down if you can. Not to be poetic. Just to be honest.

Create rituals that slow you down. An evening walk at dusk. A morning routine that does not involve a screen. Lighting a candle not for ambiance but for intention. These small acts train your attention. They remind your nervous system that the world is still capable of holding beauty, even now.

Stillness as a Teacher

After a month of constant motion, winter almost demands that we become still. Nature itself seems to insist on it. Fields lie fallow. Animals hibernate. Growth pauses beneath frozen ground. Nothing is rushed, but rather everything seems to be waiting. 

We resist this at first. Stillness can feel uncomfortable. Without constant distraction, we are left alone with our thoughts, a dangerous proposition for many.  We are faced with questions we have postponed and emotions we have not fully processed. But stillness is not emptiness. 

Winter invites us to stop long enough to hear what has been whispering beneath the noise all year. It asks us to listen not to the loud and boisterous, but to the quiet and the waiting. To the parts of ourselves that are not yet ready to bloom but are still very much alive. Perhaps, they are parts that we have not heard in years. We may find that whatever those parts have to offer are far better ideas to pursue than whatever resolution we came up with when we were caught up in the dazzle of celebrations. 

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Carrying Wonder Forward

Winter wonder is fragile. It thrives in moments of pause and disappears when rushed. But once you learn how to find it here, you can find it anywhere.

The practice of noticing does not end when spring returns. It deepens. The quiet skills winter teaches us carry forward into brighter seasons. Attention. Patience. Reverence for small things.

Winter is not an obstacle to wonder. It is a different teacher of it.

And perhaps that is the greatest gift of the darker months. They remind us that beauty does not only exist in bloom and abundance. Sometimes it exists in rest. In waiting. In the soft whispers of what has not yet awakened.

If you listen closely enough, winter is not empty at all. It is full of quiet promises.

All Aboard for Christmas Magic

There is something undeniably quintessential about a model train at Christmas. Perhaps it is the nostalgia of it, those miniature worlds humming softly beneath a glowing tree, harkening back to simpler times. Or perhaps it is the romance of travel itself, when journeys felt grand and full of promise, long before crowded terminals and flight delays dulled their shine.

Model trains were not just toys but marvels. At the turn of the twentieth century, railroads represented the height of modern technology. They stitched together cities, transformed commerce, and shrank vast distances into something manageable. It was only natural that this fascination would find its way into the home. Trains became one of the earliest mechanized toys of the modern era, first gaining popularity in the early 1900s. These were not flimsy playthings but sturdy, intricate machines meant to be admired as much as played with.

By the 1920s and 1930s, model trains had cemented their place in Christmas tradition. Department stores leaned heavily into the spectacle, constructing increasingly elaborate displays that wound through snowy villages and bustling cities, all carefully designed to stop shoppers in their tracks. The base of the Christmas tree became the perfect stage. It was practical, yes, but it was also symbolic. A glowing tree overhead, a circling train below, motion and magic contained within the heart of the home.

Whether by convenience or clever marketing, Christmas and trains became inseparable. That connection only deepened over time. Films like The Polar Express reignited the wonder for new generations, reminding us that belief, imagination, and a little suspension of disbelief are part of the season. During the pandemic, when traditions were disrupted and people sought comfort in familiar rituals, many rediscovered hobbies that had quietly faded into the background. Model trains experienced a resurgence, not as relics, but as reminders of patience, craftsmanship, and shared joy.

In recent years, that magic has increasingly moved into public spaces. Libraries, historical societies, and community centers across the country now host model train displays each December. Often these exhibits double as fundraisers, particularly for children’s literacy programs, ensuring that the magic of stories and imagination carries on long after the trains are packed away.

It was on a cold December evening that I found myself invited to see one of these displays for myself. I will admit, dear reader, that I was not initially enthused. I am not someone who has ever considered myself a “train person,” and model trains seemed, at best, mildly interesting. However, I was willing to indulge my companions in a bit of whimsy; I am nothing if not whimsical. Imagine my surprise, then, at just how utterly delightful the library display turned out to be.

The small library’s basement had been transformed into a sprawling miniature world. The display ran nearly wall to wall, a carefully constructed metropolis alive with motion and detail. Multiple tracks wove through snowy villages and industrial hubs. A baseball field sat mid-game, an airport buzzed with tiny planes, shipping lanes carried cargo through a busy harbor, and a circus burst with color and whimsy. There was even a theme park, complete with rides in motion.

What made it truly special was how interactive it all was. Throughout the display, visitors were encouraged to press buttons and bring the city to life. A ski slope sprang into motion. Barrels were loaded onto a train car. Lights flickered on in tiny buildings. Each interaction revealed another layer of thought and care poured into the exhibit.

I felt like a child again, eagerly pressing buttons and craning my neck to take it all in. Every section had been lovingly created by a volunteer using their own personal train sets. One display even featured a train over a hundred years old, still running, still enchanting, a direct link to the earliest days of electric model trains. It was humbling to realize how many Christmases that little engine had seen.

For nearly an hour, I was completely absorbed, pointing out details to my companions and discovering something new with each pass around the room. The volunteers were just as much a part of the experience as the trains themselves. They eagerly shared stories about the models and about the local area. One tale recounted the time a major league baseball team stopped to play the local team while passing through town, a small but vivid slice of history preserved alongside the miniature world.

It was, in every sense, magical.

Where can you see Christmas Magic?

For those inspired to seek out a display of their own, they are often closer than you think. Local libraries are a wonderful place to start, especially in December. Historical societies, model railroad clubs, botanical gardens, and even shopping centers frequently host seasonal displays. Many towns also have dedicated train shows or open houses where hobbyists invite the public to view their layouts. And for the truly adventurous, there is always the option of creating a small display at home. Even a single loop of track under a tree can carry more charm than one might expect.

Sometimes, Christmas magic arrives in unexpected forms. Sometimes, it hums quietly, circles endlessly, and reminds us that wonder is often found in the smallest of worlds.

Completed: 2025

Cost: Suggested donation $2

Miles from home: 18 miles

Still curious to discover more? Click here to explore!

The Gift You Give Yourself

There comes a point in adulthood when you look around at your own life and realize just how much of it was built from other people’s expectations. Parents, partners, coworkers, even strangers on the internet all seem to carry opinions about what a “good” life should look like whether that’s the classic white picket fence and 2 kids, jetting around the world or having that corner office. With the shorter days and colder nights which entice us to stay inside sipping a warm cup of tea, December has a way of handing us a quiet pause in the middle of all that noise. In that stillness you can ask a gentler and more liberating question: What if the best gift you give yourself this year is a life that actually fits you? Not a life you are supposed to want. Not a life that earns gold stars. A life that feels like home when you step into it.

Most of us carry at least a few pieces of life that no longer fit. A commitment you keep out of habit. A routine that once served you but now drains you. A goal you set years ago that you are still dragging around even though it no longer reflects who you are. Just like clothes that shrink in the dryer, some roles tighten over time until they restrict your movement. One of the most compassionate things you can do for yourself is to notice what feels constricting. If something consistently brings dread or resentment, it deserves a second look.

Try asking yourself: What do I continue to do only because I feel I should? What parts of my week feel like a performance? What drains me more than it fills me? These small gut checks can reveal more truth than grand resolutions ever will. Because often resolutions are about adding things to our lives when maybe we should be asking what isn’t serving us anymore. 

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Permission to Want What You Want

Wanting something different for your life can feel almost rebellious. We are taught early that desire is selfish or impractical. Yet desire is really a compass. It points you toward what brings meaning. The permission you refuse to give yourself is often the permission you most need. You are allowed to want a simple life. You are allowed to want a bold one. You are allowed to want rest, creativity, adventure, peace or a mix of them. 

Let go of the guilt around wanting something others do not understand. You do not have to justify your dream life like it is a court case. Your preferences do not require a panel of approval. They only require your honesty. After all, the only person who gets to live your life is you. They have their own. 

Every person inherits a set of default settings. These can be expectations from family, cultural messages or values absorbed without question. Some defaults are helpful. Others keep you living a script that never belonged to you. December is an ideal moment to ask where those settings came from. Did you choose them or were they assigned to you? Are they aligned with who you are now or with a past version of you who no longer exists?

Letting go does not always require a dramatic overhaul. It can be as simple as replacing one outdated belief with a more generous one. It can be as quiet as deciding your worth is not measured by productivity. Sometimes the life that fits begins with subtracting what never matched your shape in the first place.

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Crafting a Life That Fits

Once you clear the space, you can begin creating a life that feels right in your hands. Think of it like tailoring. Small adjustments can change everything. You might shift your morning routine to match your natural rhythm. You might redefine what rest means so it supports you instead of feeling like a guilty pleasure. You might choose relationships that nourish you instead of ones that keep you hustling for belonging.

Crafting a life that fits is not a single grand gesture. It is a set of choices made consistently. When something feels peaceful instead of performative, you are moving in the right direction.

A good life should give you room. Room to breathe. Room to change your mind. Room to fail safely. Room to explore new interests without embarrassment. If your life feels like a tight shoe, it is not a sign that you need to force yourself into it. It is a sign that you need to loosen the laces. When you prioritize a life that can expand with you, you trade perfection for sustainability. You also create conditions in which joy can actually take root instead of feeling like a visitor.

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A Gift You Keep Giving Yourself

The gift of a well-fitting life is not wrapped once and placed under a tree. It is something you give yourself again and again. Through honesty. Through reflection. Through paying attention to what your life is telling you. You will outgrow some things. You will discover new ones. You will learn what brings you back to yourself. The point is not to build a life that looks impressive. The point is to build one that feels true.

As this year winds down, take a moment to appreciate the small ways you have already reshaped your life into something more authentic. And if you have not started yet, that is all right. The gift is not in the timing. The gift is in choosing yourself.

From Chaos to Charm: Rediscovering Black Friday in a Small Town

Is there anything more quintessential to the American Christmas experience than Black Friday shopping? After we’ve filled ourselves with turkey, stuffing and assorted sides, whether that’s salad, mashed potatoes, rolls, cranberry sauce or something entirely unique to your family, we transition from a day of gratefulness to a day dedicated to preparing for giving.

A cynic might look at this shift and scoff. We spend one day proclaiming gratitude for everything we have only to spend the next guzzling greedily from capitalism as we scramble for more. And that criticism isn’t completely unfounded. Yet more often than not, our Black Friday shopping isn’t about ourselves. It’s about stretching every dollar to bring joy to the people we love. Perhaps I’m getting soft in my “old age” of my mid-to-late thirties, but I choose to focus on that spirit of giving rather than the cynicism.

I’ve only gone Black Friday shopping twice in my life. I’ve never been someone who enjoys crowds, chaos or traffic, and for years I couldn’t comprehend the whiplash of Thanksgiving gratitude followed by a pre-sunrise battle for discounted televisions.

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When I was a teenager, my brother, sister and I decided we wanted to see what all the fuss was about. We had heard stories from friends whose families braved the early-morning madness each year, tales of “insane” bargains, crowds so tight you could barely breathe and people practically wrestling over toys. It all seemed equal parts thrilling and preposterous. In our house, where our mother had every birthday and Christmas gift purchased by November 1 (the benefit of children with birthdays spanning Nov. 3 through Jan. 16), the tradition seemed very foreign. But we were curious.

I remember the three of us piling into the car while our father drove us to the mall and nearby stores. People were everywhere. It felt like the entire town had the same idea, and the sheer crush of humanity threatened to sweep us along with it. One moment I’d be looking at an item and the next I’d glance up to realize a sibling had been carried several aisles away by the crowd.

Every store was decked out in holiday finery. Decorations blinked and sparkled, loudspeakers belted out everything from 1950s classics to early-2000s pop renditions of Christmas songs and more than once we passed the Salvation Army bell ringer. I dutifully tossed in a few dollars, still not entirely sure what the organization did beyond running the thrift store my father was forever dragging me to, much to my teenage horror. (This was before I learned how to create a fashionable outfit from a thrift-store treasure hunt.)

But the bright lights, blaring music, crushing crowds and snaking traffic were far too overstimulating for my ADHD brain. I bought what I needed as quickly as possible, then begged to go home. My siblings weren’t far behind. We left exhausted, overstimulated and unanimously convinced we’d never do Black Friday again. And honestly? For nearly twenty years, I didn’t.

Now, you might be wondering why I’m writing about an experience that was so thoroughly miserable. I generally write about things that enrich my life, not ones that leave me wrung out. But here’s the thing, trying new things is part of living a rich, curious life. Not every new experience is going to be a good one, but that doesn’t mean we’re worse off for trying. That first Black Friday taught me that environments with overwhelming crowds, lights and noise simply aren’t for me. It helped me understand what I need to feel comfortable, and now I plan accordingly.

The second reason I’m writing about it is that time changes things. Something awful twenty years ago may not be awful now. Clinging to old assumptions can keep us from discovering something new, something better, something transformed.

Fast-forward almost two decades. My sister now hosts Thanksgiving for our family and her in-laws each year. Some years my brother joins; other years I host a small get-together that weekend for the immediate family. My sister often uses the Saturday after Thanksgiving to participate in Small Business Saturday.

But this year, after we hosted a breakfast with my brother on Black Friday, she suggested we wander into our small town instead of making two trips. At first, my old aversion surged back. I could practically feel the traffic inching along, recall the shoulder-to-shoulder crowd and hear the echo of blaring speakers in my mind.

But this wouldn’t be malls and big-box stores. It would be my charming little town, complete with twinkling star decorations on lamp posts and small Christmas trees outside each storefront. Maybe, just maybe, it would be different.

On a whim, I decided to lean into the cheer by wearing my green Victorian coat and a wreath of ivy with white and cranberry ribbons in my hair. We planned to arrive around 9:30, hoping crowds would still be at the big stores. We guessed right. The streets were lively, but not chaotic, and I easily parked at the local elementary school, a trick locals use to avoid the meters and keep street parking open for tourists.

My sister and I wandered through our favorite small shops: The Tea Affair, Matthew 25 Thrift Store, Wilbur Chocolate, Purple Robin, Aaron’s Bookstore, Earth to Lititz, Bunyaad and more. Rather than being crushed by crowds, we could browse comfortably. The Tea Affair was especially delightful, a sensory experience of smelling teas and choosing blends. Most stores didn’t even play music. Instead, they relied on tasteful decor and genuine smiles to create the holiday atmosphere.

As we walked, the holiday window displays felt magical. People stopped me frequently to ask about my outfit, and my answers ranged from “spreading Christmas cheer” to “the occasion is myself,” depending on my mood. By noon the vibe shifted as more determined shoppers began to appear and the stores grew crowded. Fortunately, we had completed our shopping and decided to wrap up the day.

This time, I didn’t leave exhausted or vowing never to return. I left thinking I might like to do it again next year. It turns out that timing matters. Crowds aren’t what they used to be now that online shopping dominates early-morning sales and Cyber Monday exists. People are savvier about deals throughout the year, and many prefer to shop from home in pajamas, significantly thinning out those old-school Black Friday mobs.

Did I score any spectacular deals? Not really. The closest was a six-dollar apron from the thrift store, a lucky find that probably would’ve vanished had I arrived later. But I loved supporting my local shops, knowing my money stayed in my own community and circulated among people I care about. I loved shopping with my sister and finding her the perfect gift: a painting by a local artist.

Time does change things. Experiences can transform, soften or reinvent themselves. Of course, the opposite can also be true (as my different Disney World trips will attest, one lovely, the other quite disappointing), which is why approaching familiar things with an open mind matters, especially when years have passed.

Black Friday is a time-honored American tradition. It isn’t for everyone, but then again, nothing I write about is. Still, it sits on many Christmas bucket lists and holiday-season must-dos. And because I try to live life with curiosity, openness and a willingness to rediscover old things anew, I gave it another chance.

And I’m glad I did.

(Usually, I include a short section on how you can experience this bucket list item for yourself. However, I shaln’t cover that which the marketing departments have so thoroughly disseminated.)

Completed: Once in childhood

Miles from home: Local mall 12 miles from home

Cost: Budget in childhood was $50

There is so much more to discover. Check out my list so far!

When Life Goes Wrong for Ten Minutes, You Don’t Have To

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Woven Dreams: A Nantucket Basket Forty Years in the Making

Sometimes, dear reader, our own bucket lists take a polite step to the side so someone else’s long-cherished dream can finally march forward in all its glory. In this case, it wasn’t a bucket list at all. It was a basket list. A Nantucket Shiplight Basket list, to be precise, which I admit feels far more poetic. After all, who among us would not be charmed by the idea of holding a piece of maritime history in our hands.

My mother certainly was. Ever since she was a teenager, she had been enchanted by these elusive vessels after reading about them in some long-forgotten book or article. I picture her as a younger version of herself, curled up somewhere cozy, imagining the rugged New England coastline, the wild Atlantic surf and perhaps, if I know her, a sailor or two with a jawline sharp enough to cut rope. I cannot blame her. The sea does tend to conjure such visions.

I am sorry, where were we. Ah yes. Baskets. The point is, dear reader, these particular baskets are not ordinary containers for fruit or wayward junk mail. They are woven pieces of history, shaped by sailors who braved storms, isolation and boredom of legendary proportions. The romance is built right in.

A Bit of History for the Curious Soul

Long before tourist shops and Instagram feeds filled with beach scenes, the waters south of Nantucket Island were treacherous. Shoals shifted like restless spirits and ships were known to meet rather unfortunate ends. Since the terrain was not suitable for a proper lighthouse, lightships known as shiplights took up residence. Picture a floating lighthouse, bobbing in the waves, anchored against the dark and fog and hoping a vessel would notice it in time. That was the job of the lightship. Simple in theory. Terrifying in practice.

These ships were staffed by small crews who lived aboard for long stretches, typically thirty days at a time. They battled storms, loneliness and the constant fear that some overconfident captain might sail directly into them. Many did. More than one lightship was destroyed after being struck by the very boats it tried to save.

With little to do during calmer stretches, sailors turned to crafting. By the 1860s, the earliest Nantucket Lightship Baskets began to appear. These were not decorative heirlooms but practical, sturdy, beautifully utilitarian containers. Their bases, rims and staves were usually made back on the island. Sailors then brought them aboard, using the long quiet hours to weave. The moulds were created from old ships’ masts, giving the baskets yet another tie to maritime life.

Over generations, the basket-making tradition shifted from survival activity to artistic craft. Baskets became more decorative, more intricate and far more sought after. Today, Nantucket baskets are treasured symbols of New England craftsmanship. And, thanks to the price tags, they are also symbols of New England’s talent for charging quite a lot for tradition.

A Dream My Mother Tucked Away

My mother fell in love with the history long before she ever saw an actual basket in person. For decades she dreamed of owning one. But as prices climbed higher and higher, the dream began to sag under the weight of practicality. The baskets became something for “someday.” And someday, as we all know, is a tricky creature. It slinks away easily.

Years passed. Then decades. The dream gathered dust like so many silent hopes. She never complained about it. She never pined or sighed dramatically like a Victorian heroine. She simply tucked it away, which was somehow even sadder.

Thankfully, dear reader, she has me. And I am not someone who lets dreams die quietly.

A Daughter on a Mission

The spark reignited on a trip to Boston to visit a friend who, as it happened, made Nantucket baskets as a hobby. When my mother held one of his creations, her whole face softened. There was awe. There was longing. And there was that quiet little note of resignation. The “oh well, not meant to be” tone that mothers perfect somewhere around the third decade of adulthood.

Absolutely not, I thought. To hell with resignation. Not on my watch.

Now, could I have snagged her a $400 basket. Technically yes. But financially, spiritually and stubbornly, no. That felt like cheating. I wanted something more meaningful. Something rooted in effort and delight and a little bit of chaos, as most great family stories are.

The opportunity arrived in the most unexpected way, as opportunities often do. Last fall, my mother and I took an eco-dyeing class at the PA Guild of Craftsmen. We spent the morning dunking fabric into pots of botanical color like two witches brewing questionable potions. During the class, we met a man named Bob, who casually mentioned that he taught classes on Nantucket Baskets.

Was it fate. Probably. Was it the universe gently nudging me toward destiny. Quite possibly. Was it also the direct result of my inability to mind my own business and my tendency to ask questions of every friendly stranger. Absolutely yes. Sometimes, fate needs a little nudge or a full on push.

The Watch Begins

From that moment on, I became a woman possessed. I haunted the Guild’s website like a Victorian ghost with unfinished business. Week after week I checked for upcoming classes. I refreshed the page with the kind of intensity usually reserved for airline deals or Taylor Swift ticket drops.

Then one day, I saw it. A class scheduled for the weekend of my mother’s birthday. Perfect. Beautiful. A sign from the gods themselves.

I contacted my sister. I confirmed schedules. I clicked the button to register.

The class had just filled.

Great was the gnashed teeth. Fierce was the shaking of my fist. Dramatic was my lamentation to the heavens. I am after all nothing if not dramatic!

But if you know nothing else about me, know this: I do not give up. Not even when the universe tests my patience for sport.

Not two weeks later, a new class appeared. Spots: available. And I pounced. I registered so fast you would think I was trying to secure the last lifeboat on the Titanic. Victory was mine. And so was a guaranteed memory for the ages.

The Big Day Arrives

Two weeks after her birthday, my mother, sister and I arrived for our class. For those unfamiliar, Nantucket baskets are not really considered beginner friendly. They require precision, patience and a willingness to accept that reeds will snap at the least convenient moment. Luckily, we had Bob. And Bob is a gem. If basket making had spirit guides, he would be one.

With calm instruction and gentle humor, he helped us understand the mechanics behind the magic. He showed us how to keep the weave tight. How to handle breakage. How to adjust when things started to go sideways, which they did often. There was laughter. There was mild cursing. There was one moment when my mother threatened to throw her reeds into the void, but Bob intervened with the patience of a saint.

My mother struggled at times, especially early on. Her arthritis made the tight initial weaving difficult. But here is where the real beauty emerges. When her hands faltered, my sister and I stepped in. We held reeds steady. We tightened the weave. We supported her hands with our own. And together, we built something worth far more than its materials. Something no price tag could ever reflect.

When the baskets were finally complete, we sat back in awe. They were beautiful. Not flawless. Not identical. But better. They were us. They were hers. They were woven with history and love and the combined effort of three determined women.

A Dream Fulfilled at Last

My mother waited more than forty years for this. Four decades spent admiring a dream from afar, telling herself it was too impractical, too expensive, too indulgent. But standing there with her basket in her hands, crafted by her own perseverance and supported by her daughters, something shifted. The dream became real. Tangible. Hers.

At sixty-five years old, she crossed something off her list that she never thought possible. And she did it in the best way imaginable. Not by purchasing a finished piece but by creating one with her own hands.

And if that is not the very heart of bucket lists, I do not know what is.

We often think of bucket lists as daring adventures or far-flung travels, but sometimes they are simpler. Sometimes they are woven, stitch by stitch, in quiet rooms with people we love. Sometimes the most meaningful items are the ones rooted in memory and heritage and personal longing. And sometimes the best thing we can do is help someone else check off something they stopped believing was possible.

So here is the lesson for you, dear reader. Do not be fooled by dreams that go silent. They are still there, waiting for you. Whether they are big or small or slightly unexpected, they deserve air and attention and the chance to surprise you. And it is never too late. Never too strange. Never too sentimental.

Sometimes a dream is simply a basket. But sometimes that basket carries forty years of hope, a good story, a tiny bit of chaos and a whole lot of love woven into its staves.

And those are the dreams worth chasing.

How might you chase your own piece or maritime history?

If reading this has awakened something in your soul, dear reader, perhaps a tiny spark whispering that you too might enjoy owning or crafting your very own bit of seafaring heritage, then rejoice. You are not alone. There is something irresistible about holding an object shaped by hands, hope and history. It connects you to all the sailors who once sat aboard those rocking lightships, weaving to pass the time while storms rolled over the horizon.

So how might you chase your own piece of maritime magic.

First, you can absolutely look for a class in your local area. Basket weaving workshops pop up in the most unexpected places. Community art centers, craft guilds, even the occasional museum loves to host heritage craft classes. The only caveat is that the further you wander from Nantucket’s salty shores, the rarer these particular baskets become. The tradition simply never spread far inland, perhaps because weaving a basket while imagining rolling waves is far more romantic when you can actually hear them outside the window.

If you would rather skip the learning curve entirely, you can always purchase your own Nantucket basket from a skilled maker. These pieces are true works of art, and buying directly from an artisan helps keep the craft alive. It also saves you from the mild existential crisis that comes from snapping reeds for the fourth time in an hour. Trust me. I have lived it.

But maybe you are like me and prefer a little chaos with your creativity. Maybe you want to try your hand at the weaving itself. In that case, you are in luck. You do not need a ship. You do not need a lighthouse. You do not need to brave the open ocean with only six crewmates and a questionable supply of biscuits.

What you need is a guidebook, some materials and the enthusiasm of a determined dreamer.

Thanks to the endless wonders of the internet, you can now find instructional books for a very modest sum along with kits containing everything from bases to staves to the all-important mould. No need to fashion one from a retired ship’s mast like the sailors of old. Unless you happen to have a ship’s mast lying around, in which case, dear reader, I have questions.

With online tutorials, craft forums and even weaving groups on social media, it has never been easier to learn a heritage craft from the comfort of your own home. You can chase your own dream while sipping tea in your pajamas, which feels like a delightful improvement from doing it aboard a lightship in a gale.

And that is the beauty of our modern world. Dreams that once required proximity, luck or a friendly sailor now simply require curiosity and a willingness to start.

So whether you sign up for a class, purchase a handmade treasure or gather your supplies and embark on the weaving adventure yourself, may your own journey into maritime history be filled with joy, discovery and perhaps a little bit of mischief. After all, the best stories are the ones we make with our own hands.

Completed: Nov. 2025

Cost per person: $150

Miles from home: 12 miles

If this was your cup of tea, I have plenty more stories to inspire your own.