BudgetBliss

Rooted in Community: A Favorite Local Market Adventure

Published on November 6, 2025November 2, 2025 by BudgetBlissLeave a comment

Every Tuesday, without fail, something wonderful happens in the next town over. Long before the rest of the world has finished its morning coffee, Root’s Country Market comes alive. It starts quietly at first, a few trucks pulling in, the soft murmur of vendors setting up, the smell of early morning coffee drifting across the lots, and then, before you know it, the place is buzzing. Root’s has been a Lancaster County staple since 1925, and in the hundred years since it first opened, it’s become something more than just a market. It’s a living, breathing community tradition.

Side bar: Locals pronounce it “Ruut’s,” not like tree roots, a small detail, but one that marks you as someone who really knows the place. Welcome to Lancaster County where nothing is pronounced like you think it would be, not even Lang-kiss-ter.

Roots is a sprawling labyrinth of over 175 indoor and outdoor stalls, each one offering a little piece of local life. You’ll find farmers with fresh produce still damp from the morning dew, bakers arranging pies so fragrant you can smell them before you see them, and crafters setting out handmade candles, quilts, and wooden toys. Step a little further and you’ll stumble into antiques and flea market finds, old tools, vintage glassware, forgotten records. It’s perfect for a treasure hunt! There’s even a livestock auction, which means you might be standing in line for a soft pretzel while hearing the rhythmic chant of a fast-talking auctioneer in the background. It’s part of the charm.

Root’s is the kind of place that engages all five senses at once. The air is thick with the smells of kettle corn and barbecued chicken, mingling with freshly turned earth from the produce stands and, occasionally, that unmistakable farm scent that reminds you you’re in the heart of the country. Fresh country air takes on a new meaning in farm country. There’s the shine of ripe tomatoes, the golden glow of honey jars, the colorful chaos of flower bouquets. Vendors call out greetings to regulars.

If you visit during the busy seasons, late spring through early fall, the crowd hums like a hive. There’s a rhythm to it, a flow of movement as people drift from stall to stall, chatting, sampling, bargaining. You can lose hours wandering without realizing it. And then, just when you think you’ve seen it all, you’ll turn a corner and find something unexpected: a new baker, a quirky handmade sign, a table full of fresh herbs or a bin of farm-fresh eggs that look like they came from a paint box.

I may not be a morning person, but my favorite time at Root’s is the early morning, when the sun is barely up and the crowd hasn’t yet arrived. The vendors are still setting out their goods, the coffee is hot and strong, and there’s a quiet peace to it all. That’s when you can have those real, unhurried conversations, when you can talk to the man who grows the apples you buy every fall, or the woman who hand-pours every candle on her table. You’re not just shopping; you’re connecting.

What makes Root’s special isn’t just what you can buy, it’s who you’re buying it from. There’s something grounding about handing your money directly to the person who grew your tomatoes or baked your bread that morning. You can ask them how the season’s been, or what variety of pepper this is, or how long they’ve been coming to Root’s, and they’ll tell you, usually with a story that’s worth hearing.

Some families have been selling here for generations. Others are just starting out, testing their small business dreams one Tuesday at a time. Together, they form the heartbeat of this place, a reminder that commerce can still be personal, that community can be built over a counter full of peaches and pies.

And the prices? Let’s just say that fresh, local, and affordable aren’t mutually exclusive terms here. You can fill a tote bag with vegetables, grab a fresh-baked loaf of bread, and still have money left for lunch, maybe a chicken pot pie or a funnel cake, depending on how virtuous you’re feeling, and I am seldom neglect to give into temptation here.

Root’s began back in 1925, when local farmers gathered to sell their goods directly to neighbors. A century later, it’s grown into a sprawling market and auction complex that somehow still feels small-town. It’s open year-round, rain, snow, or sunshine (not blizzards or floods though) every Tuesday without fail. Generations have grown up wandering its aisles, marking time not by the seasons but by the rhythms of Root’s, sweet corn in July, apples in October, wreaths and crafts in December.

It’s rare, in a world where everything feels increasingly online and anonymous, to have a place like this, one where you can see the faces behind your food, hear the laughter of old friends meeting up by the pretzel stand, and know that you’re part of something with roots (pun intended) deep in local soil.

Not everyone is lucky enough to have a place like Root’s right outside their door. For me, it’s not just a market, it’s a midweek adventure, a reminder to slow down and savor the simple joys: fresh food, friendly faces, a good deal, and a connection to the land and people that make up my home. Every visit feels different, but it always leaves me with that same contented feeling — a mix of nostalgia, community, and appreciation for the abundance that surrounds us.

So if you ever find yourself in Lancaster County on a Tuesday, make your way to Root’s. Come early, bring cash (although most vendors do now accept cards), and be ready to wander. Take in the smells, the sounds, the cheerful chaos of it all. Chat with the farmers and crafters, find something unexpected, and maybe grab a slice of shoo-fly pie for the road.

Because at Root’s, you’re not just shopping, you’re stepping into a century-old story that still unfolds, week after week, right in the heart of the community.

How can you experience your own farmer’s market adventure?

If you don’t live near Lancaster County, don’t worry, almost every community has its own version of Root’s tucked away somewhere. Previously, it seemed farmer’s markets were going the way of the dodo, but community efforts have revived the practice all over as determined locals, with pride and love for their communities decided to reconnect us all with our roots. Look for local farmers markets or seasonal pop-ups in your town or the next one over. Many run weekly through the spring and summer, while others operate year-round. Visit early, bring cash, and take the time to talk with the people behind the tables. You’ll find that even the smallest market has its own personality, its own rhythm, and its own sense of community. It’s one of the easiest, and most rewarding, ways to connect with the place you call home.

Completed: A Tuesday in my childhood and ongoing into my adulthood

Miles from home: About 10

Cost: Free parking and however much you want to spend. My most recent visit was about 6 dollars.

Still looking for ideas to do in your own local community? Check out the rest of my Bucket List – most of the items completed from my own backyard!

Stop Measuring Your Life by Someone Else’s Clock

Published on October 29, 2025October 27, 2025 by BudgetBlissLeave a comment

I spend a lot of time writing about things that you ought to do. I share adventures I’ve taken that I think you might enjoy and encourage the choices that make our lives better. After all, my goal, both for myself and for you, dear reader, is to build a life so rich and fulfilling that we no longer crave escape from it.

A life where our bucket list adventures don’t act as brief breaks from monotony, but as extensions of a life we already love.

Seldom do I write about what we shouldn’t do. But as we work toward creating lives worthy of gracing any bucket list, there are habits, beliefs, and quiet mental traps that can drag us down. They don’t announce themselves with flashing lights. They sneak in through our routines, our comparisons, our “shoulds.” And before long, they sap the joy right out of us.

This post kicks off a new mini-series: things to avoid if you want to protect your joy.

The first joy-sucker on our list?
Measuring your life by how it “should” be by now.

The Tyranny of the Timeline

Many of us were handed a script early on.

Go to school.
Get a job.
Meet someone nice.
Get married.
Buy a house.
Have kids.
Work hard.
Retire.
Enjoy your golden years.

It’s tidy, it’s predictable, and for some people, it works. But for many of us, life doesn’t follow that script. We graduate later, or not at all. We change jobs. We move. We fall in and out of love. We skip the house. We skip the kids. Or we find new dreams entirely.

And yet, that little voice in the back of our heads still whispers:
“You should have figured it out by now.”
“You should be married by 30.”
“You should have your dream job by 40.”

As if our lives are meant to unfold like clockwork, all hitting the same milestones at the same time.

And when we don’t? We call ourselves failures.

Not married by 30? Spinster. Might as well get a cat and a cardigan.
Didn’t make partner by 40? A has-been.
Still renting at 50? Must’ve done something wrong.

But let’s pause here. Whose voice is that, really? Society’s? Our parents’? Our own inner critic, parroting what we were taught?

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

The Myth of “Too Late”

The truth is, there’s no such thing as “too late.”

Colonel Sanders didn’t start Kentucky Fried Chicken until he was 62.
Julia Child didn’t write her first cookbook until she was 50.
Stan Lee didn’t create Spider-Man until his 40s.
Milton Hershey failed with multiple candy shops before founding Hershey’s Chocolate.
And sliced bread? It took over a decade to catch on as an idea people actually wanted.

Even Abraham Lincoln, that pillar of perseverance, lost job after job and election after election before becoming one of the greatest presidents in history.

If any of these people had believed the story that they’d “missed their window,” they would’ve stopped before success ever arrived.

And if that seems like ancient history, look around today. Some of the most interesting, creative, and fulfilled people I know are those who stopped trying to follow the timeline and started following their curiosity instead.

They’re going back to school at 45.
They’re switching careers at 50.
They’re learning to paint or surf or start a business long after the world says they should’ve “settled down.”

You’re Not Late. You’re Just on Your Path.

Julius Caesar once lamented, at age 32, that he hadn’t yet achieved what Alexander the Great had by the same age. At the time, Caesar was a minor administrator with little acclaim. He had no idea that his greatest accomplishments were still ahead of him.

We all have those moments, standing before the metaphorical statue of someone else’s success, feeling small by comparison.

But your path isn’t supposed to look like anyone else’s. You’re not on Alexander’s timeline, or your neighbor’s, or your sibling’s. You’re on yours.

Every detour, every pause, every “failure” teaches you something that smooth sailing never could.

The Cost of “Should”

Spending time lamenting what hasn’t happened yet only keeps us stuck. It traps us in the past, in a cycle of comparison and self-judgment. We get so focused on the shoulds, what we should have done, where we should be, that we miss what’s right in front of us.

It’s like staring at the GPS instead of enjoying the drive. You’ll get to where you’re going, but you’ll have missed all the scenery along the way.

And let’s be honest: nobody builds a bucket list life by following someone else’s map.

Charting a Different Course

Here’s the thing: your “timeline” is just a story. You can rewrite it anytime you want.

Maybe your bucket list includes seeing the Northern Lights, writing a book, starting a garden, or falling in love again. None of those dreams come with an expiration date.

You don’t have to “make it big” to make your life meaningful. Sometimes the best things we build are small, moments of joy, quiet progress, and self-acceptance.

The most extraordinary lives often grow from the most ordinary days, repeated with care and curiosity.

So Let’s Ditch the Clock

Stop measuring yourself by where you should be. Start asking where you want to be—and what small step you can take today to move in that direction.

Because life isn’t a race. It’s not a checklist. It’s a collection of moments that, if we’re lucky, we get to fill with wonder, growth, and connection.

You’re not behind. You’re becoming.

And that, dear reader, is exactly where you’re supposed to be.

From Clueless to Capable: The Day I Built a Computer and Believed in Myself

Published on October 22, 2025October 19, 2025 by BudgetBlissLeave a comment

When you’re young, some skills seem cloaked in mystery, like sorcery reserved for geniuses and tech wizards. Building a computer? That was right up there with rocket science and brain surgery. I assumed there were secrets mere mortals like me weren’t meant to know.

But life has a funny way of pushing you toward the very things you once swore you couldn’t do. You can either jump in feet first and learn to swim, or wait for the tide to rise and drag you under anyway. Either way, you’re getting wet.

And so, in my mid-twenties, I found myself staring down yet another failing laptop. It wheezed, groaned, and crashed under the weight of programs it could no longer handle. I was broke, still living with my parents, and drowning in student loans. The idea of dropping another few hundred dollars on a “cheap” computer that would die in two years made me want to scream into a pillow.

Alright, maybe I’m being a little dramatic, but that’s what you’re here for, isn’t it?

Anyway, I was ranting to my boyfriend about how all laptops were secretly designed to self-destruct after the warranty expired, when he calmly suggested, “Why don’t you just build your own computer?”

I blinked. Me? Build a computer? Was he crazy? He did remember who he was talking to right?

Computers, to me, were mysterious boxes powered by tiny gremlins and questionable magic. I had no idea what lived inside those metal cases, chips, cards, wires, possibly dark energy? I was convinced it was all beyond my comprehension or at the very least too expensive for me to fail at. No, the safe bet was just leave it to the experts.

But my boyfriend reassured me that he’d done it before and that he’d teach me. And that, to me, made all the difference. I’ve always appreciated people who say, “Let’s do this together,” not “Let me just do it for you.” He believed I could do it and all I needed was a little guidance.

It turns out, building a computer isn’t mystical at all, it’s basically adult LEGO. Or, if you prefer, a high-stakes IKEA project without the Allen wrench and with slightly more terrifying price tags.

Once you know which parts fit together (the motherboard and CPU have to be compatible, for instance), the rest is pretty much plug-and-play. We picked out the parts piece by piece: RAM, graphics card, hard drive, case, power supply. He explained what everything did, how much power I’d need, and why I shouldn’t cheap out on cooling fans unless I enjoyed the smell of burning plastic.

Assembly was surprisingly satisfying. The motherboard, that flat green city of circuits, practically tells you where each piece goes. Most parts only fit in one spot, it’s almost foolproof. The trickiest part? Making sure every last cord is plugged in correctly. There’s always one that likes to hide and sometimes cords don’t quite reach so you have to get a different one.

Once it was all together, we booted it up with an operating system on a USB drive (a step up from the “CD-ROM” era). The screen flickered to life, and, voilà, my very own computer.

That was over fifteen years ago.

I’ve only had to swap out a few parts since, upgrading the graphics card here, adding a new hard drive there. Instead of throwing down thousands on a brand-new computer every few years, I get to be strategic and invest in pieces that will last. If one piece gets old or outdated, I replace just that piece. It’s like car maintenance, but less greasy.

My first build cost me about $1,000, spread out over a few months of saving, but it’s still running strong. Not bad for something I once thought required a degree in wizardry.

But the best part wasn’t the computer, it was what it did for me.

That project shifted something in my mindset. It made me question how many other things I’d written off as “too complicated.” Since then, I’ve built a shed, laid a patio, and even tried to fix my washing machine (it almost worked, turns out the part required more muscle than I had).

Now, I don’t rush to say, “I can’t.” Instead, I ask, “How hard could it be?”

It’s not about proving I “don’t need no man”, it’s about proving to myself that I’m capable. Because the truth is, most obstacles aren’t out there in the world; they’re in our heads. Once you push past that mental block, confidence grows like compounding interest.

And if it all goes sideways? Well, at least you’ll have a good story, and probably a few extra screws. Okay, in my case, a lot of extra screws.

Ready to Try It Yourself?

If you’ve ever thought, “I could never build a computer,” consider this your sign. Start by watching a few YouTube tutorials, read a build guide on PCPartPicker, and pick components that match your budget and goals.

It might take patience (and maybe a few deep breaths when cables don’t click in right), but when that screen finally flickers to life, you’ll feel like you just performed magic—minus the wand.

And if all else fails? You’ll still have learned more about how your tech works than 90% of people ever do. Plus, you’ll gain something far more valuable than a PC: proof that you can tackle things that once terrified you.

Because sometimes, the best way to build confidence… is to literally build something.

What You Need

Case – The shell that holds everything together.
Motherboard – The “main board” that connects all components.
CPU (Processor) – The brain of the operation
RAM – The short-term memory; helps your computer multitask.
Storage – SSD or HDD, where all your files live.
Power Supply (PSU) – Feeds electricity to every component.
Graphics Card (GPU) – Optional, but crucial for gaming or design work.
Cooling System – Fans or liquid cooling to keep things chill.

completed: 2010

cost: About $1000 (has saved me at least that much in replacement costs over a 15 year lifespan)

miles from home: 0

wanna check out some of my other bucket list items? Check out my Bucket List and My Reverse Bucket List

Photo by Valentine Tanasovich on Pexels.com

Leaves, Branches, and Roots: The Art of Choosing Who to Grow With

Published on October 15, 2025October 12, 2025 by BudgetBlissLeave a comment

In my earlier post, The Secret to Lifelong Friendships, I talked about how showing up isn’t enough. Friendship, real friendship, requires discernment. We only have so much time and energy, and it’s important to invest those precious resources in people who truly deserve them.

But how do you know who those people are?

Several years ago, I stumbled across a short clip that’s stuck with me ever since. I wish I could credit the original creators, but the message has taken root (pun intended) in my mind all the same. They explained that there are three kinds of people in your life: leaves, branches, and roots. Once you hear it, you’ll never look at your relationships the same way again.

The Leaves

Leaves are lovely things—bright, colorful, full of life. They make the tree beautiful for a time, dancing in the sunlight. But when the season changes, they do too. They fade, fall, and blow away.

Leaves are the people who come into your life for a season. Maybe it’s a college roommate you clicked with instantly, a coworker who made a tough job bearable, or a friend who was exactly who you needed for that chapter of your life. They bring joy and color, but they aren’t meant to stay.

It’s easy to mourn when a leaf drifts away. You might think, What did I do wrong? But often, nothing went wrong at all. Their purpose in your story was simply fulfilled.

Leaves aren’t bad. They’re just temporary. And that’s okay.

After all, we’re all leaves in someone’s life at some point. Even as a therapist, I remind myself that I’m a leaf for my clients. I’m there for a specific season, to help them heal, but not to continue into their next one. Leaves are beautiful for their ephemeral nature and I treasure the memory of those who have been leaves in my own journey.

Photo by Jude Mitchell-Hedges on Pexels.com

The Branches

Branches are trickier. They seem sturdy, reliable, and capable of holding weight. They’re there year after year, and you might trust them to always be there, until one day, a storm hits, and that branch snaps.

Branches are the people who seem like roots. They’re present for birthdays, celebrations, even crises. You lean on them, and for a time, they hold you up. But when life gets heavy or messy, they can’t always bear the load.

Sometimes a branch breaks because they’re dealing with their own storm. Sometimes it’s because the relationship was only meant to grow to a certain point. Either way, it hurts, but that doesn’t mean they didn’t serve a purpose.

Not everyone has the capacity to be more than a branch in your life. Some people are meant to offer shade, not structure. The key is to recognize the difference before you climb too high and find yourself falling.

Photo by Kennst du schon die Umkreisel App? on Pexels.com

The Roots

And then, there are the roots.

Roots don’t look like much. They’re hidden underground, unglamorous, and often unnoticed. But they’re the reason the tree stands tall through every season. Roots are the reason a fallen tree can seemingly rise up as a new sprout from the ashes of destruction.

Roots are the ones who anchor you when the winds howl. They draw strength from deep places and share it freely. They know your history and love you anyway. They notice your silences. They show up not only when it’s convenient but when it’s costly.

Roots are rare, and they deserve to be cherished. You don’t need many, just a few that go deep enough to hold you steady.

These are the relationships that you should nurture and prioritize most, because they will be there when the leaves have faded and the branches have failed you.

How to Tell Who’s Who

So how do you know if someone’s a leaf, branch, or root? Here are a few clues:

Consistency reveals character. Does their care depend on convenience? Leaves and branches often vanish when the weather turns cold; roots stay, even when it’s uncomfortable.

Depth over drama. Branches can be fun and lively, but roots go deep. They’re not always loud, but their love has substance.

Mutual growth. A root relationship nourishes both sides. If you’re always pouring out but never being replenished, you might be watering a branch.

Conflict doesn’t end it. Roots can handle disagreement. Leaves blow away at the first strong wind.

Time tests truth. You don’t truly know what someone is until you’ve been through a few seasons together, joy, loss, distance, and change. Roots endure them all.

One Last Thought

Not everyone is meant to be a root in your life, and that’s okay. You aren’t meant to be a root for everyone who is in your life. We are all playing those three parts for various people in our lives. I am a leaf for my therapy clients, a branch for my friends and acquaintances but I am a root for my closest friends and family.

Leaves and branches have their beauty and their purpose. The goal isn’t to cut them off, it’s to recognize them for what they are so we are able to make wise decisions with whom to trust and count on.

What matters most is that we know where to invest our energy and learn to celebrate people for the role they play, not the one we wish they’d fill.

Because friendship, like a tree, thrives when we tend to the roots, and let the leaves fall when it’s time.

How I Became a Lady (Sort Of)

Published on October 8, 2025January 3, 2026 by BudgetBlissLeave a comment

It finally happened, dear reader, I’ve ascended the social ladder or perhaps I was just finally given my due. After years of modest living and an enduring fondness for mud-splattered hiking boots, I am now… a Lady. Or at least, that’s what the certificate says.

This rather illustrious transformation occurred thanks to my brother, who, in an act of Christmas generosity (and perhaps a touch of mischief), purchased me an “Irish title.” Technically, I am now the Lady of Kerry, complete with a small plot of land, or as the fine print clarifies, a symbolic square foot that could just about accommodate a particularly skinny daisy. I can go visit it, but I can’t redecorate or reside there on a permanent basis.

Now, before you curtsey, a word of reality: companies like Established Titles offer honorary recognition rather than true nobility. My title doesn’t come with a castle, serfs, or even a teapot emblazoned with my crest. Although, now that I think of it, I could perhaps purchase one for my stove here at home. Historically, “Lord” and “Lady” were titles granted by monarchs or inherited through noble bloodlines, not acquired via online checkout. But honestly, who am I to let historical accuracy get in the way of a good story?

Besides, the funds go toward preserving the land and history of Ireland, a cause close to my heart. My mother’s family is Scots-Irish, and I’ve always felt a deep connection to that misty emerald isle. I fell in love with its spirit: the wild cliffs, the songs that seem to rise from the earth itself, and the way history hums beneath every stone wall and ruined abbey. I love reading its stories, exploring its history back into the very days of Newgrange over 7,000 years old.

When I was younger, I took up the Irish fiddle and have returned to the instrument of my youth. I dabbled in Irish step dance in college. More recently, I even tried my hand at learning the language through Duolingo — Dia dhuit, if you will. When I finally visited Ireland, it felt like walking into the pages of an old legend. The Book of Kells took my breath away, and the rolling green hills seemed to whisper secrets older than time. Part of me was quite tempted to simply disappear into the countryside and see if the fae truly existed.

So yes, while my noble title may be symbolic, the sentiment behind it is genuine. And as an avid fantasy reader, I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t dreamed of being a Lady, though perhaps more the sword-wielding, dragon-slaying kind. If this little piece of parchment brings me one step closer to that dream, then I say it was money well spent.

Of course, being a lady hasn’t exactly transformed my daily routine. I still brew my own tea, scrub my own floors, and trip over my own dignity with regularity. No invitations to high society luncheons have arrived (yet), and my “estate” is still contained within a flowerpot on my porch. But perhaps the true nobility lies not in titles, but in finding humor, history, and heart in the small things.

So here I stand, Lady of Kerry, warrior of laundry day, slayer of dust bunnies, and humble admirer of the Irish hills. My crown may be metaphorical, but my affection for Ireland is entirely real.

So how might you become a “lord” or “lady”

Ever since the launch of Established Titles, there has been a plethora of copy-cat companies all offering the same thing, a little certificate saying you “own” a piece of land or castle in Ireland or elsewhere in the British Isles and therefore can now call yourself a “lady”. The money raised usually goes to the preservation of that land or castle, because it is expensive to maintain that history. Who knew that nobility was only a mouse click away?

Completed: 2021

Miles from home: 0

Cost: $25- $60 depending on the kit purchased

Want to check out my other adventures?

Start exploring here

Perseverance, Patience, and the Messy Middle

Published on October 1, 2025September 30, 2025 by BudgetBlissLeave a comment

There’s a particular kind of grit that comes with chasing a dream. We love to imagine it looks like early morning coffee, crisp planners, and perfectly color-coded calendars. But more often? It looks like forgetting to do your make up in the morning, an ever growing to do list, and you googling things like “how do small business taxes even work??” at 1:43 a.m.

At least, that’s been my experience.

When I first decided to start my own business, I thought the hard part would be the leap, the “yes” moment of committing. I have a master’s degree in social work, after all. I know how to put in effort, write long papers, and juggle competing deadlines. But what I didn’t know at the time was that starting a business has less to do with your shiny diplomas and more to do with your tolerance for uncertainty.

And spreadsheets. So many spreadsheets.

The Unexpected Curriculum

Here’s the thing no one told me when I hung out my proverbial shingle: running a business isn’t just doing the work you’re trained for. It’s marketing. It’s budgeting. It’s answering emails without throwing your laptop out the window when you become overwhelmed.

There have been days where I thought, “Maybe I should’ve gone for an MBA instead,” because suddenly I’m learning about SEO, website analytics, and why my carefully written social media post only reached three people (two of which were my mom and my sister).

I didn’t expect to be stretched in so many directions at once. But somewhere along the way, I realized that every spreadsheet conquered, every awkward networking event survived, and every late-night “YouTube crash course in branding” is not just a skill gained; it’s evidence of perseverance.

The Myth of Straight Lines

I’ll be honest: I’m a “goal person.” Always have been. There’s a thrill in setting a finish line and then running toward it with laser focus. But the problem with laser focus is that you miss everything happening around you. The flowers along the path. The unexpected detours. The side quests.

When I started this business, I wanted to sprint. Set it up, succeed immediately, then coast on the satisfaction of a dream realized. But that’s not how growth works.

Instead, it looks more like two steps forward, one step back, and then an unplanned sideways shuffle because some new challenge popped up. It’s messy. It’s nonlinear. And if you only measure yourself against the end goal, you’re going to feel like you’re failing most of the time.

Setbacks ≠ Failure

There’s this dangerous narrative out there that if you’re not crushing your goals 24/7, you’re doing it wrong. I call nonsense.

Setbacks are not failure; they’re part of the process. And boy is it a process!

That day you spent spinning your wheels on a project that went nowhere? You learned something. The week you felt unmotivated and questioned if you were even cut out for this? That’s not wasted time, that’s recovery. Muscles grow in rest, not constant strain.

The truth is, perseverance isn’t about never stumbling. It’s about stumbling, catching your breath, and saying, “Well, that was humbling,” before you get up and try again.

Kindness Along the Way

Here’s where I’ve had to check myself: I’m quick to extend kindness to others, but when it comes to me, I have a default setting of “be harder, push more, no excuses.” That mindset can be useful when you’re grinding out a degree or chasing a deadline, but in long-haul pursuits like building a business? It’s a recipe for burnout. And honestly, as a therapist I need to practice what I preach.

If a friend told me they were exhausted from learning ten new skills at once, would I say, “Well, tough luck, push harder”? No. I’d probably say, “Wow, you’ve already stretched so much. Celebrate that, then rest.”

And maybe I’d hand them a cookie.

So why is it so hard to give ourselves that same gentleness? Maybe because we think perseverance has to look like suffering. But what if true perseverance includes kindness? What if the only way to keep going is to balance the push with the pause?

Embracing the Journey

Here’s what I’ve learned: success isn’t just reaching the goal. Success is in the stretch. In the skills I never thought I’d learn. In the ways I’ve been humbled, refined, and sometimes (begrudgingly) patient.

Don’t get me wrong, I still want the goal. I still picture what it’ll feel like when all the pieces finally fit together. But I’m learning to appreciate the scenery on the way. To actually stop and smell the flowers (sometimes literally, when I escape to my garden after too many hours at my laptop).

Because the truth is, if you’re only happy at the finish line, you’re going to spend most of your life discontent. Goals take time. Growth takes time. And joy doesn’t live exclusively in the future, it’s right here in the messy middle, if we let ourselves see it.

Final Thoughts

So if you’re in the thick of pursuing something big, whether that’s starting a business, chasing a personal dream, or just trying to hold it together during a tough season, here’s what I want you to know:

Perseverance isn’t a straight line.
Setbacks don’t mean failure.
You deserve kindness from yourself, not just from others.
The journey itself matters as much as the destination.

If you need to pause, pause. If you need to pivot, pivot. None of it erases your progress. In fact, it’s proof that you’re still in the game.

And if you’re like me, so laser-focused on the goal that you forget the beauty of the in-between, take this as your gentle reminder: stop for a moment. Breathe. Smell the flowers.

The finish line will still be there when you’re ready to run again.

Beyond the Classics: Fantasy Books to Add to Your Reading Bucket List

Published on September 17, 2025January 3, 2026 by BudgetBlissLeave a comment

While most bucket list items require at least a trip out your front door, some of the best ones ask for nothing more than a comfortable chair, a cup of tea, a purring cat, and a book. Not everyone thinks of reading as a bucket list activity, but plenty of readers consider finishing the “greats” an accomplishment worth doing before you “kick the bucket.”

Lists of Books to Read Before You Die are everywhere, compiled by literary authorities, publishers, or critics. The argument for reading them is solid: classics can enrich your life through timeless themes, enduring wisdom, and universal insights into the human condition. They can expand your vocabulary, sharpen your writing, and deepen your appreciation for culture and history. Sometimes, one book really does shift your perspective forever.

And yet, I don’t always agree with these lists. It’s not that the classics aren’t worthy, it’s just that… well… many of them are boring. There, I said it and I shan’t take it back! I’m a fantasy and science fiction reader at heart. Outside a few exceptions, books outside those genres are of little interest to me. Oh, do not mistake me for an uneducated plebian. I’ve read my share of “required” classics (even in German, no less), but some really do go on. Did I really need to know that much about the Parisian sewer system, Victor? I appreciate the symbolism, but I nodded off halfway through. Perhaps, it’s my ADHD mind which just wanders off when things don’t spark my intrigue.

That doesn’t mean I don’t have a reading bucket list outside my “To Be Read Pile”, which we aren’t discussing. They will be read, when they are read! I digress.

My Reading Bucket List simply reflects my love for fantasy and science fiction, the genres that spark my imagination most. A few years ago, I stumbled upon a “Top 20 Fantasy Series of All Time” list, not compiled by critics, but by a survey of BookTube influencers. Yes, it’s biased toward modern titles (and leans millennial/Gen Z), but I liked the idea of readers (not industry insiders) deciding which stories deserved a place on the list. (We won’t get into all the politics behind what books get placed on those classic lists, we’d be here all day with me ranting.)

To my delight, I had already read about half. The rest became my summer project in 2022. Armed with my library card and Kindle, I sampled each new series, reading at least the first book to see if it hooked me. Some didn’t, but then not every book will be my cup of tea. Others were revelations, hidden gems I never would have found without the list. They were witty, profound, beautifully written, and layered with history, culture, and insight, even while transporting me to other worlds. While none of them were life-changing, they certainly sparked introspection and reflection, opened up ideas, and at times challenged my ways of thinking.

If you’ve struggled through traditional “must-read” lists and found yourself uninspired, maybe it’s time to look at fantasy. Between epic sagas and modern masterpieces, there’s a wealth of stories waiting to change the way you think, or at least keep you delightfully entertained. The list below is a great place to start. You’ll find household names alongside underappreciated treasures, each with the potential to expand your reading horizons.

Final Thought

Reading bucket lists don’t need to be confined to dusty classics or daunting tomes. If fantasy and sci-fi are what light you up, then let those genres guide your journey. After all, books are more than assignments, they’re invitations into new worlds. And what better way to spend your limited time than wandering through worlds filled with wonder?

Completed: Ongoing

Costs: Free depending on your library, borrowing from friends and book exchanges

Miles from home: Light years depending on the book

There’s a surprising amount of things to do just outside your door if you know where to look. Check out my Bucket List and Reverse Bucket List to see how I have checked out my list without having to go very far.

Reclaiming Boredom: Why Doing Nothing Might Be the Best Thing You Do

Published on September 10, 2025August 30, 2025 by BudgetBlissLeave a comment

I know, dear reader, this might be the last place you’d expect to find a defense of boredom. After all, many of you probably clicked here to escape boredom, not embrace it. I may even be digging my own blogging grave by suggesting you spend less time scrolling and more time staring at your ceiling. But this space was never meant to trap you for hours. Its intention has always been to help you live a fuller, more mindful life, without breaking the bank.

As someone with ADHD, the idea of boredom used to feel impossible. Tedium was my sworn enemy. Yet I’ve come to realize that boredom is a rare luxury these days. With our phones glued to our palms, we rarely get the stillness that allows us to simply be.

And here’s the secret: boredom isn’t the enemy. It’s the birthplace of philosophy, creativity, and growth.

Why We Need Boredom

When you’re left alone with your thoughts, they can be loud, uncomfortable, even overwhelming. But without that discomfort, how can you truly know yourself? When do you ever stop to ask:

Am I on the right path?
Are my relationships enriching or draining me?
What do I actually want out of this short, strange life?

Noise drowns out those questions. Silence, and yes, boredom, makes space for them. And while the answers might not always be pleasant, they’re necessary for meaningful growth. It’s only when we ask those questions that we begin to fully develop a meaningful life which according to some researchers may be the antidote for the crushing anxiety we’ve all been feeling. According to Harvard Professor Arthur Brooks, it is the lack of meaning that drives so much of our modern world’s anxiety and depression and boredom would be part of the cure!

Boredom also boosts creativity. When the mind wanders, it problem-solves. Einstein famously worked at the Swiss Patent Office for seven years, a job so dull it practically begs for daydreaming. Out of that monotony came some of the most groundbreaking ideas in physics. Imagine what we might uncover if we swapped YouTube shorts for a little mental white space. You may be quite shocked at what problems you solve whilst driving your car.

Finally, boredom sparks curiosity. That restless itch pushes us to seek out novelty, to wander past the familiar bend in the road. Dissatisfaction with the status quo has always been the engine of human progress. It’s what drove Columbus to set sail and spark the West’s discovery of the world. It’s what drove the Wright Brothers to the sky. It’s what made humanity ask “what is up there in the vast expanse above us?”

Boredom in Real Life

Some of my best ideas have come when I was bored. This very blog was born while I was gardening. Insights about my therapy clients have surfaced while I was elbow-deep in dishes. I’ve written entire stories in my head while waiting in line, or mulled over questions of faith while driving down long stretches of highway.

Boredom isn’t wasted time, it’s compost. Given space, it grows something new.

How to Reclaim It

So how do you let boredom back in? Start small.

Turn off your podcast or music while you drive or clean.
Try a tech-free meal and see what real conversation shows up.
Block out one phone-free evening a week.
Take breaks from social media, or better yet, set parental controls on yourself.
Use your phone’s Do Not Disturb mode generously (you can allow emergency calls to still come through).

Will it be fun at first? No. That’s the point. But over time, you’ll come to see boredom not as an absence but as an opening. I’ve even started protecting mine, because that mental wandering is often far richer than anything TikTok could offer.

Beyond the Frame: Experiencing Van Gogh in 360°

Published on September 3, 2025January 3, 2026 by BudgetBlissLeave a comment

I’m not sure if you’ve noticed, dear reader, but we’re in the thick of a technological revolution—what with artificial intelligence, immersive media, and smart devices popping up faster than I can finish my morning coffee. With every leap forward, the world reshapes itself: some innovations are delightful, others… decidedly less so.

But before you brace for a philosophical tirade, rest easy. This isn’t about the doom and gloom of progress. Today’s post is about something far more charming, and perhaps a bit science fiction, how technology is transforming the way we experience visual art, and how I got to see that transformation firsthand through the Immersive Van Gogh Experience.

For centuries, visual art has been something we look at, admired behind velvet ropes or under museum lighting. We view a painting, reflect on its symbolism, absorb its mood, and then move on. It’s typically a passive interaction, appreciated but always held at arm’s length.

Now, thanks to clever combinations of projection mapping, music, props, and sometimes even VR goggles, we can step into the world of a painting. These experiences dissolve the frame. The art swirls around us, alive with movement, sound, and color. It invites not just observation, but participation. We’re transported into a world shaped by brushstroke and emotion, where time bends and the impossible feels touchable. If you’re a fan of Star Trek it can feel as though the Holodeck isn’t far behind us – or would it be ahead of us?

Such was my adventure on the outskirts of Philadelphia. I attended the Immersive Van Gogh Exhibit, where his iconic works leapt from flat canvas into full surround. It was a modest production by immersive art standards, but well worth the 50-minute drive. The exhibit unfolded in three rooms, beginning with a respectful introduction to the artist’s life: the genius, the grief, and the legacy.

Vincent Willem van Gogh, the Dutch Post-Impressionist painter, is now recognized as one of the most influential artists in Western history. He created over 2,000 works, 800 of which were oil paintings, many during the final two years of his life. Though immensely talented, he also struggled deeply with mental illness, most likely Bipolar Disorder, experiencing intense periods of depression and mania. He spent time in psychiatric hospitals, often neglected his health, and famously cut off part of his left ear after a dispute with a close friend.

I would be remiss if not highlighting the efforts of his sister-in-law. As It’s entirely possible the world would have forgotten him, had it not been for her, Johanna van Gogh-Bonger, who championed his work and preserved his letters after his death. Her tireless efforts not only shared his story but helped cement his artistic legacy. Too often we focus on the face and talent of a given operation without appreciating the supporting cast of characters. After all in any endeavor it takes a village to succeed.

While the trope of the “tortured artist” is often romanticized, Van Gogh’s story has opened broader conversations about mental health, creativity, and resilience. Beyond the mythos, his art also sparked interest in unexpected fields, like fluid dynamics. Scientists have observed that Starry Night mirrors real-world mathematical models of turbulence, patterns that weren’t formally understood until decades after Van Gogh painted them. He may not have known the equations, but his brush captured the energy of the cosmos with stunning intuition.

His story gently unfolded as I walked through the exhibit. I heard excerpts from his letters and watched his still-lifes float, twist, and evolve across the walls. One moment, I was standing in his bedroom; the next, sunflowers danced around me, filling the space with golden light. My favorite moment was in the largest room, reclining on a seat and watching Starry Night come to life, accompanied by music that echoed the emotion of each painting. I could’ve stayed there for hours, had my parking meter not rudely reminded me of the outside world.

There was something deeply calming about it all. The way the paintings moved, the soft narration, the glow of color, it felt like being wrapped in a blanket of light and sound. The only thing missing was a hot cup of tea to sip while I drifted through it all.

Eventually, I had to peel myself away from Van Gogh’s swirling skies and rejoin reality. I refilled the meter and met my traveling companion (my mom) in the gift shop to find a souvenir. She chose a beautiful necklace that still earns her compliments. I, ever the practical one, picked up a set of coasters, because if I must collect things, they might as well be useful. Additionally, if I must have things, they may as well be beautiful. A memento with function and a memory with purpose.

While technology certainly has its downsides, I’m genuinely excited to see how it will continue to open new windows into the past, especially when it’s done with care, creativity, and reverence. If we can blend art and innovation without losing the soul of either, I’d say that’s progress worth celebrating.

Finding Your Own Immersive Art Adventure

If your curiosity is piqued and you’re ready to step inside a painting (or at least escape your laundry pile for an afternoon), immersive art exhibits are popping up in cities all over the world. A quick search for “immersive art experience near me” or checking sites like Exhibit Listings, Eventbrite, and even local museum calendars can help you find upcoming shows. Popular exhibitions include Immersive Van Gogh, Monet: The Immersive Experience, and Frida Kahlo: Immersive Biography, among others. Many cities now have dedicated digital art spaces that rotate different artists throughout the year. Social media is also surprisingly helpful, follow local art museums, galleries, and pop-up exhibit pages to stay in the loop. And don’t be afraid to go solo! These exhibits are made to be experienced personally, and sometimes the quietest wanderings are the most rewarding.

Completed: 2022

Cost: $24 per person

Miles from home: 75 miles

If you enjoyed this tale, there are many others which can be found on my Bucket List and Reverse Bucket List

You Are Not Your Job Title or Accomplishments

Published on August 27, 2025August 10, 2025 by BudgetBlissLeave a comment

If you hold a lauded job title or a coveted position of prestige, there’s a certain smug satisfaction in answering the question, “So, what do you do?” It’s a subtle flex, a way to signal you’ve “made it” in the eyes of your listener.

But how quickly those titles lose their shine. Positions are demoted, job descriptions rewritten, and reputations shift depending entirely on the values and prejudices of the crowd around you.

Consider the plumber who proudly tells his wife’s academic friends that he owns his own business. Their admiration evaporates the moment they realize he’s a tradesman. Or his wife, who announces at his company picnic that she’s accepted a university teaching position, only to have his employees quietly roll their eyes at her “ivory tower” job.

Prestige, it turns out, is not universal and rather fickle.

Perhaps when I mention that my full-time job is as a therapist, you’re impressed. Or perhaps you think, Oh, that’s nice, but why didn’t she get a doctorate? Or maybe you shrug, completely unmoved.

Our identities are often tied to our titles and achievements. And it’s not entirely irrational—after all, our accomplishments are a kind of social currency. They determine whether we’re welcomed into certain groups or quietly excluded. They tell others, at least superficially, our “value” as a person.

The trouble begins when that’s the only place our sense of worth comes from.

Achievements fade. Their novelty wears off. You ran a marathon…..ten years ago. You climbed to the base camp of Everest, great, but that was so last season. You earned $90,000 last year, until someone else mentions they earned $100,000.

When your worth is pegged to being ahead of the curve, you’re doomed to chase the next thing endlessly and there’s always someone ahead of you. Even those on top must always try to stay ahead of the people nipping at their heels.

It’s the comparison trap in action:

Stacey got married.
Joanna bought a house.
Darlene is having a baby next month.
Marcy is off to Japan.

And you? You got a promotion, but you’re still single, renting, and aware of a ticking biological clock. Suddenly, your win doesn’t feel like much of a win.

But why should our worth be determined by what we’ve done instead of who we are?

Yes, I am a therapist, but that’s not all I am.

I am a daughter, a sister, a girlfriend, a cat mom, and a loyal friend. I am an avid reader who likes to snuggle into blankets and a seeker of adventure itching to explore. I adore tea and classical music. However, I also love coffee and metal. I’m not much into mainstream sports, but I do enjoy horses, kayaking, dancing, and hiking. I play the violin and videogames. I can be sarcastic and biting, yet equally capable of deep compassion and empathy. I’m a bit of a perfectionist and a bit of a mess.

I am nuanced and complex.

My degrees, my travels, my career, they’ve shaped me, yes. But they are not me.

Photo by Mindaugas Lazdauskas on Pexels.com

Some cultures have already figured this out. In many parts of the world, “What do you do?” is not the opening line of a conversation.

In the Netherlands, it’s considered downright rude to lead with your job title. People there would much rather discuss shared interests than compare résumés. In France, introductions often revolve around passions, ideas, and experiences. The goal is to find connection, not establish a pecking order.

Imagine how different our relationships might feel if we borrowed that approach.

A Thought to Leave You With:
If your job disappeared tomorrow, if your title, salary, and résumé vanished, what would you still have to say for yourself?

Because that answer… is who you truly are and it’s an answer worth exploring.

Author: BudgetBliss